Dear World,
Since when have curvy and fat become synonyms?
Dear Dudes trying to hit on me,,
If you know who John Eggbert,Ask Ketchum, Nibbles, Bean the Dynamite, Kiku Honda, and Princess Luna are and have an awesome sense of humor then it might happen.
Dear best friend,
It's not funny when you text me after school induction day to say that you've found four awesome new friends, that you've replaced me and don't want me anymore. You know I have abandonment issues.
Dear best friend,
Thanks for going to the gym with me. And thanks for going at my pace.
Dear overweight people,
If I don't have a right to comment on your body, you don't have a right to comment on mine. Deal?
Dear people,
I was wrong. I was wrong about racism in America. I know that now, and I'm ready to make a change. I just wanted you to know that I've learned so much, and there IS hope.
Dear websites with accidental texts from parents about cheating,
If any of this were true, you would realize that getting a text like that is traumatic and upsetting. The last thing you are thinking about is exploiting it.
Dear men who shave,
Please stop being such little babies about your face and how it burns and makes you sore. You know that your grandad probably used one crazy-kill-you-dead-if-you-mess-up-sharp-ass-blade and never complained?
Dear best friend's boyfriend,
You bought her flowers, built her a den with a TV inside, made her pancakes and always offer to rearrange your plans with her so that she can go out with her other friends
Dear world,
I'm not ready to be a senior yet!!!!
Dear Guys who honk at me from their cars,
What is the point of that? Even if I appreciated that kind of attention (which I don't) there's no way for me to respond to it before your drive off.
Dear Cherry turnover,
I'm not even hungry, but I know that if I don't eat you now I won't get any. So I'm just going to stuff my face now.
Dear woman at the supermarket the other day,
It is neither your business nor your right to chasten others about charity with snarky comments and stupid giggles when you have no clue about what goes on in their life. Maybe I donate lots to charity, more than just two dollars: time.
Dear Fellow Teenagers,
We don't need to text every second of every day, and 99% if a text is an emoji or a word like okay, yeah, or yup it is acceptable for it the be the end of the conversation. It isn't that I don't like you or don't want to talk to you, I just don't want to text you every second of my life long past when we've run out of anything to say.
Dear Customers,
Your bra and other undergarments are not pockets. Please excuse the disgusted look on my face as I douse your money in lysol.