Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
Dear over achiever,
You had to remind the teacher about our homework the day that I didn't do it?
Dear mom,
So... you're saying that I should NOT bring my pokemon cards to college?
Dear Queen Latifa,
Thank you for showing people everywhere that you don't have to be a size 0 to be beautiful.
Dear American high school students,
What exactly did you do in school the past twelve years?
Dear Asians,
Please don't get offended when we can't tell whether you're Chinese or Japanese.
Dear Doctor,
You hope to see me soon?
Dear Victoria's Secret,
Crotchless underwear? Seriously?
Dear Secret Life of the American Teenager,
My only secret life consists of sleeping with a teddy bear, not every boy at my high school.
Dear preschooler,
What color is the slide again?
Dear woman who got insulted when I asked if she worked here,
It's not my fault you decided to wear khakis and a red polo at Target.
Dear people who have never been kissed,
Don't be sad you've never been kissed. Be glad you didn't waste it on the wrong person.
Dear tattoo,
Please be fake! please be fake!
Dear teacher,
If I don't know how to spell it how can I look it up in the dictionary?
Dear police officer,
Have fun explaining why you just hit that parked car...
Dear elbow,
Well, I just dislocated my shoulder... but I finally licked you!
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