Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
Dear kids of today's generation,
Just because it's being re-released in 3D does not make it your movie.
Dear big brother,
Remember when you told my boyfriend that if he ever made me cry, you'd make him cry?
Dear Toddlers and Tiaras,
This is a message from your future.
Dear there's no "I" in team,
There is in the spanish version.
Dear mothers on my campus tours,
Yes, your daughters will see boys in our co-ed bathrooms.
Dear woman staring at my four ladies in Target,
They have Down Syndrom. They also have full-time jobs, pay rent for the facility they live in, and are the farthest thing in the world from the "drain on society" you just accused them of being.
Dear 13 year old who just had a pregnancy scare,
Really?!
Dear girls at my school who dress like hookers,
Just because we don't have a dress code doesn't mean you should wear your work clothes.
Dear travel agency,
How much for a trip to Narnia?
Dear amazing looking boy who is single,
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?
Dear cooking instructions,
Please tell me that "golden brown" comes after blackened.
Dear Grandma,
No one can convince me to be a lawyer. I'm going to be a scientist.
Dear Amanda Bynes,
You had a TV show with dancing lobsters. How did you not turn out like us?
Dear 2012,
Now that vampires sparkle, I think the next logical step is glow in the dark zombies.
Dear Facebook,
YouTube has a dislike button.
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