Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear world,
No, I am not going to shove my religion down your throat. I'm not going to ask for your money. I support your gay marriage and I love my muslim neighbours. I would like the same judge free accpetance, please.
Dear little brother,
Please stop making fun of the weird girl in your class. Remember when I came home crying every day, and you threatened to beat up kids twice your size? It was because they were doing exactly what you are doing.
Dear person at my door,
Usually if I don't answer after 15 minutes, I most likely won't answer after 30 minutes.
Dear "boyfriend",
So according to Facebook, you're single now?
Dear father who told me crying doesn't help anything,
I just found out crying helps with the flow of serotonin in your brain to boost energy levels and cheer you up.
Dear school,
We go to school for 8 hours a day, just to come home and do 5 more hours of work?
Dear math teacher,
Please don't teach us on a graphing calculator if you are not going to let us use it on the test.
Dear caps lock,
Thank you for allowing me to yell at my friends from a distance.
Dear Youtube,
Please explain how your ads stream perfectly, but the videos take forever to load.
Dear society,
Why is it that high school mothers and illegal aliens can go to college for free but the rest of us have to be in debt for years?
Dear mean sister-in-law,
I may be fat, but holy cow do I have fantastic breasts!
Dear boyfriend,
Next time I try to be cute for your birthday and make you a coupon for anything you want, please consider your options more thoughtfully...
Dear teachers,
If you don't want to trip over me, don't put me in the front row of class.
Dear prank-obsessed brother,
Happy Saturday! I hid 13 alarm clocks all over your room.
Dear twin,
You forgot my birthday?!
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