Dear car with their brights on,
It's cool, seeing is overrated anyways...
Dear people against abortion,
You realize birth is the leading cause of death...
Sincerely, think about it
Dear Christian school,
You're saying tank tops aren't allowed because they're a distraction to boys?
Sincerely, are my shoulders that sexy?
Dear people who live on the second floor,
I know I'm easy, but that doesn't mean you have to constantly use me.
Dear student who tried the "My dog ate my homework" excuse,,
...the assignment was to submit an essay online...
Sincerely, skeptical teacher.
Don't you ever feel like yelling "CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUS" when something goes wrong?
Sincerely, it makes the situation 10x better, I assure you
Where are you? I thought we had plans for tonight? I hope I didnt scare you off when I told you that I loved you...
Sincerely, Still awake at 5:30am
Dear touch screen,
Thanks for letting my crush know that I've been creeping on their Facebook profile.
Sincerely, just accidently 'liked' their post from 2 years ago while trying to scroll down
Dear Emma Watson,
I understand why you quit school. I would get angry if every time I answered a question someone yelled, "10 points for Griffindoor!"
Dear Neville Longbottom,
After how crappy your life has been, I figured it was time someone was nice to you.
Dear Urban Outfitters Catalogue,
Who on earth goes hiking in the outdoors while wearing only a skirt, thick heels and a crop top?
Sincerely, Ohhh wait, you also have a beanie to protect you from harsh weather..never mind
Dear "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?!",
No, but I do kiss your wife.
Sincerely, the look on your face was priceless
Dear Professors I asked a recommendation from,
Telling me to write it and you'll just sign it?
Sincerely, Going to make myself sound like the greatest student you have ever had.
Dear tall people,
Watch out. We bite ankles.
Sincerely, short people