Dear Teenage Family,
Please Know that my judgmental looks didnt come from the fact that you look like you're 12 and have a kid, or the fact that your boyfriend glared at me when he walked right through the door and I held it open for you ecause you were carrying said baby. They came from when you got in the car, closed up all the windows, AND THEN BOTH OF YOU LIT CIGIRETTES!
Dear "best friend",
That's the fifth time you've said you don't have plans, promised to hang out in an hour, and then left me hanging. Next time just tell me you're busy - I promise I won't mind.
Dear friend,
Please stop bringing money and wealth into every conversation we have. We don't care that your family is super rich. We don't care that you have servants at your father's house and we don't care that your entire family only wears designer clothes. I can't afford to buy a laptop even though I desperately need one. Our other friend is considering going to community college to save on tuition, and your best friend has worn the same broken glasses for months because she can't afford to get it fixed. The way you flaunt your wealth only makes us feel worse and makes it harder to relate to you.
Dear douchebag feeling me up with the "firetruck" game,,
I'm aware that firetrucks don't stop at red lights. Please get your hand off my thigh before I tell you what WILL stop it.
Dear boy in my class,
No, I did not slap you because I'm racist, I slapped you because you grabbed my ass without having my consent. That's called sexual harassment - no matter whether your skin is white, black, green, yellow or purple.
Dear Math Teacher,
Please don't stop teaching the lesson because some of the students are being assholes who won't shut up. Don't tell us "Good luck" on the homework and stomp off. Please.
Dear Ex-Girlfriend,
You could of told me that you were pregnant before you got the abortion. It was my choice too.
Dear Parents who think I'm a horrible daughter,
I've never gotten drunk, done drugs, or smoked. I'm still a virgin, and I do my homework every night. I do my chores without being asked, and volunteer at a homeless shelter almost every week.
Dear Father of my child,
Please I know you have moved on and everything but it would be nice for you to acknowledge our son and make the effort to see him more often. Its nice when you do. He loves when you are around. Even if its once a month.
Dear woman at the supermarket the other day,
It is neither your business nor your right to chasten others about charity with snarky comments and stupid giggles when you have no clue about what goes on in their life. Maybe I donate lots to charity, more than just two dollars: time.
Dear random guy in disney,
Please have the courtesy to smoke when your not around kids
Dear Mom,
Please stop saying "It's just a phase" whenever I bring up the topic of me being bisexual.
Dear Messy Rommates,
Please clean up the freakin kitchen! When you all leave dishes to pile up in the sink, and all over the counters for days and/or weeks on end, you make it impossible just to get a glass of water, yet alone cook anything. Don't even get me started on the smell.
Dear first roommate at college,
I wanted to make this work, I really did. But when all you talk about is you and your problems, I find it harder and harder to even be in the same room as you. You are very self-centered. You blast the music genre you know I hate, you leave messes everywhere, and have no regard for any other person other than your weekly crush. You act like a two year old when you take every concievable kitchen utensil out to use and put nothing back, and give everyone else attitude when we ask you to clean it up. The list really goes on and on. I'm trying to be patient and be nice, becasue I believe everyone deserves that, but you are making it really hard for me.
Dear parents,
Did you not realize what my initials would be?