Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear girls who wear make up significantly darker than their actual skin color,
You're not fooling anyone.
Dear roommate,
The bathroom that you share with three other people is not the place to have serious heart to hearts about relationships on speakerphone. I need to poop and get ready for bed.
Dear Dad,
Does this mean I can start going out with men four times my age?
Dear boy who volunteered to photograph the girl's volleyball game,
All of these photos are of the girls' butts.
Dear old lady Wal-Mart cashier who told me she doesn't approve of teen moms,
Good thing that little girl's my niece then, huh?
Dear people who do not consider teachers to be "professionals",
Can you read this?
Dear Tom Riddle,
You are the only one who can own a diary and still be as manly and threatening as ever.
Dear Lady Gaga,
I lost a lot of respect for you when you called Adele fat. I thought you were anti-bullying?
Dear people using the Bible to "support" their ignorant and hateful opinions,
THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!
Dear TSA,
Yes, I did fall down the stairs and break my ankle just to hide a bomb in my cast.
Dear English teacher,
Why are we studying Bob Marley's writing in our "African-American Literature" unit? He's Jamaican.
Dear J. K. Rowling,
I was sad when Sirius died, depressed when Dumbledore died, sobbing when Fred died... but Dobby? TOO FAR!
Dear "I'm never going to use this in real life",
That awkward moment when a someone holds a gun to your head and demands you recite the quadratic formula...
Dear society,
If teenage girls can listen to male artists, how come it looks weird if teenage guys listen to female artists?
Dear homophobic moron currently in considerable amounts of pain,
Next time don't be so quick to assume that gay means weak.
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