Dear ex best-friend,
YOU confronted ME and asked for an apology, which was something I gave two years ago but willingly gave again because I truly am sorry for what I did. Don't complain on Twitter about the fact that I 'finally' apologized when YOU asked for it. Please grow up, forgive me, and move on
Sincerely, leave me alone
Please realize that surreptitiously throwing away the condom I had in my medicine drawer while helping me pack to move to a new apartment is not an effective way of encouraging abstinence.
Sincerely, your (adult) daughter
Please realize that I quit because you were a terrible, miserly, autocratic manager who took your personal problems out on me. Know that venting the pent up rage from your home life on your employees is completely inappropriate. It is however, a great way to get them to quit! You also put me through financial hardship as well dude - and that wasn't cool either. Asking how my five other jobs are going is not you being polite. It's you being a jerk. Pay people a living wage. Life with 6 jobs sucks. It sucks almost as much as being insecure about your rent and next meal.
Sincerely, Got a better job the very next day
Dear kids at school,
Please stop acting like little kids. We're high schoolers, and there's no need to go around humping each other and pretending to slap the teacher's butt when she bends over to get something. Really? You guys suck.
Sincerely, a girl who actually goes to school to learn.
Dear my boyfriend's parents,
Please stop forcing your religion on your son. How can you not realize that its wrong to tell him, "Being Christian is a family tradition! You have to be Christian, you have no choice in the matter"? Can't you see that he suffers every day because of what he believes in?
Sincerely, don't you realize that its okay to be different?
Dear girl who flirts with my boyfriend,
Yeah, I get it, you two were friends before I started dating him. Doesn't give you an excuse to try and make a move on him when I'm right there. I can be vicious.
Sincerely, the ticked off girlfriend with a field hockey stick
Dear People who's opinions I didn't ask for,
If you think 'paying to go running in a gym is stupid because you could do that outside' then kindly butt out. Last time I ran outside a man tackled me into the bushes and shoved his hand down my shorts.
Sincerely, but either way, it's really none of your business
The one time I actually wear makeup you criticize me!
Sincerely, no, eyeliner does not make me look goth
Dear Parents and siblings,
Please realize, that if you want me to stop hanging around in my room without any of you, then you should stop mocking me over everything. "Nerd" isn't an insult, but you insult me for being one. Get over yourselves.
Sincerely, You're seriously pissed off daughter and biggest sister.
Next time just say where you are going on the weekends instead of lying to me
Sincerely, tired of being alone every weekend
Please Put down the damn phones, and watch your kid play the game. I'm tired of having kids look up after a good play and only seeing your zombie face staring at the screen. It's a horrible feeling for them.
Dear Relationship Gurus of the World,
My friend told me that a guy she liked is off limits.
Dear ap English teacher,
No I'm not stalling I really do read this slow.
Sincerely, smart secretly dyslexic student that doesn't appreciate your very vocal accusations...
Dear gay friend,
We were good friends before you realised I was Christian, why are you acting strange around me now?
Sincerely, I accepted your sexuality. Why can't you accept my religion?