Dear former boss,
Please don't contact me because you forgot someone's name. Don't contact me unless you want to offer me my job back.
Dear parents,
Did you not realize what my initials would be?
Dear judgemental people,
They aren't my children, they are my little brother and sister and even if they were my kids, who are you to judge me? Obviously they are clothed and fed and loved.
Dear roommate,
i am so happy you are moving out. now i will never have to worry about you going through my stuff stealing my valuables. you did nothing but lie this whole time, you never payed your rent on time and when you did pay you only paid half. you went through everything in this house that wasn't yours, you eavesdropped on every conversation i had even when i told you it was private. you raised the power bill so high by leaving every light on in the house. i do not feel sorry about you not having a place to go to. you did this on your own, instead of spending all your money on beer you should have been paying your rent. dont beg me for forgiveness, you will not get it.
Dear dog owner who just let your dog crap on my lawn,
Please clean up your dog's "present." It's not my job to deal with that shit...literally.
Dear best friends who thought they were being funny,
Please remember that just because im "innocent" doesn't mean i don't know what a vibrator is
Dear Jade (my cat),
Thank you for coming over and licking my face to make sure I was okay when I fell down the stairs.
Dear Soon to be Ex-Husband,
Please realign your priorities. You might think that 'your time' with the kids is enough but every time you say you are going to go a doctor's appointment or see them and don't, you break their hearts. Every time you ask to hand them back early, you make them lose hope. Understand that one day I will be remarried to a wonderful man, a better man than you ever were and if you continue down the path that you are on, our children will be able to look up to him. They see him as the father you could/should have been.
Dear People who fake needing 'medical marijuana' just so you can get high,
I do hope that you never, ever, ever know the agony of intractable, uncontrollable, chronic pain ~ for which certain forms of cannabis can be of great help as a last resort
Dear my overly analytic daddy,
You say I need to get help, and maybe I do...but just saying that I need it is different than actually getting me help. If you aren't willing to help me, don't pretend that you are going to help me or say that I need to get help.
Dear person who said I didn't deserve that scholarship,
Please take a look at my application. Yes, that does say 4.7 GPA, 210 volunteering hours, three sports, band, and a four job five days a week. Wait, you have a 2.6 GPA, no volunteering hours or job, and no other activities.
Dear High School students,
Please treat the school's public bathroom as if they were your own property
Dear bullies,
Call me what you want, it won't change who I am
Dear Teachers Family and Friend's Parents,
Please don't make me take off my hood/hat because you think it's "rude" to wear it.
Dear douche bag sitting in front of me,
Thanks for that asthma attack you gave me