Please stop calling every day for a case update. Nothing has changed since yesterday!
Sincerely, paralegal whose time you are wasting
Dear Anti-gun Americans,
Please realize that the only reason your country exists is because everyday people had guns and were willing to use them.
Sincerely, It's a basic right, deal with it.
Dear Victoria's Secret,
"Canadian residents must correctly answer a mathematical skill-testing question to redeem prize," is a part of your contest rules.
Sincerely, Is that for real?
Why did the "M" in your name change from "Music" to "Maternity"?
Dear fellow atheists,,
Please stop being assholes. Seriously. You bitch and moan about being "oppressed" if religious people make even slight references to their faith, yet you think it's okay for you to blatantly disrespect and insult others' beliefs?
Sincerely, an atheist who is tired of hypocrisy and intolerance
Please take responsibility for my things being misplaced. You were the only one around when they went missing, and you admitted to cleaning, which equates to moving shit around. It's not cute to play the victim.
Sincerely, it's common sense
Dear most internet atheists,
Please stop generalizing religious people as science smothering ignoramuses.
Sincerely, a Catholic who believes in evolution.
Dear noxious coworker,
Your threat to quit would be a lot more effective if everyone here wasn't rooting for that outcome.
Please take your weather back. We are dying up here
Dear difficult people in my life,
Although it's been hard, you've shown me exactly who I don't want to be when I grow up.
Sincerely, thank you
Please stop accusing me with smirks for all the noise going on in my bedroom while my boyfriend was over
Sincerely, yes I'm seventeen and still enjoy a good pillow fight
Hitting on us is really flattering and all but i kinda wish you would try getting to know me or at least know my name before you ask if you can have my number.
Sincerely, be a gentleman.
Dear best friend,
When you get a girlfriend and then later ask why we never dated- I'm secretly screaming on the inside.
Sincerely, I thought you liked me as a sister!
Supporting non-heterosexual peple doesn't mean I'm a lesbian. I don't need to hack off my leg to support people with missing limbs...
Sincerely, your straight-as-a-stick daughter