Dear elementary and high school teachers,
Please continue to tell your students how sports aren't going to pay the bills or get them anywhere in life.
Sincerely, the college athlete double major thanks to her sports scholarship
Dear mom,
I am only 2 minutes late for curfew...
Sincerely, you don't have to yell at me
Dear boyfriend,
Please explain to me how I'm "manlier" than you.
Sincerely, I just showed you how to check the oil and change the spark plugs
Dear "normal kid",
Special needs kids NEED the help. You wouldn't understand unless you are one of them.
Sincerely, offended special needs kid
Dear friend whose work gave her a gift card instead of paying her overtime,
I'm fairly certain that's illegal...
Sincerely, the fact that you buy a lot of your clothes from there is irrelevant.
Dear Girl who just suggested we completely close our borders,
Please remember both of your parents are immigrants, you have told us thousands of times.
Sincerely, You are a pretentious rich girl
Dear Adults in my restaurant,
If you are over 5 you should not leave a mess like one!
Sincerely, You got more food on the table and floor than we served!
Dear people saying I could do better than "a guy like that",
He loved me 100 pounds ago
Sincerely, we will love each other through thick and thin
Dear boyfriend's brother,
Please, just please, stop it. You are a known pot and heroine addict. I'm in marching band. You stole a bike your parents were going to give you for Christmas to pay for drugs, I went on a trip with them because I respect them. You got kicked out by your parents, I get invited to come over whenever I like. I may have taken his virginity, but I give him something you don't: love.
Sincerely, stop judging me when you can't get your life together
Dear skinny girls,
Before you talk about how "fat" you are, take a second and look around at who you're talking to. If someone around is bigger than you are, just keep it to yourself. We're tired of inadvertently being called fat to our faces. Try thinking of other people.
Sincerely, chubby girls.
Dear grandma,
Don't complain about how technology is ruining my generation. You're such a hypocrite.
Sincerely, you have an iPad, two computers, and a smart phone.
Dear woman in line behind me at my old high school,
Please stop complining about how 'unorganized' the band and chorus concert is. It's run by high school students; were you expecting professional ushers in white gloves? Also, you do in fact have to pay because that's how the fine arts programs make money since the school has none to give them.
Sincerely, former 4-year chorus senior that doesn't mind paying $5 to support her old school
Dear kids in the restrooms,
Please realize when someone yells "I'm using this stall" ' it doesn't mean look under the door
Sincerely, annoyed bathroom users
Dear aunt,
Please stop saying, 'Ooh! Look how big you've gotten!' whenever you see me!
Sincerely, that stopped being nice three years ago
Dear offended girl,
I'm really sorry I called you dude. I call everyone,girl or boy, dude. But, you shouldn't take it too personally.
Sincerely, You tend to call everyone, girl or boy, "sweetheart".


