Dear Old Spice,
Please stop making your commercials for housewives... I will wear the deoderant I want and no amount of Old Spice will make me a pro athlete or someone you despise less.
Sincerely, Axe doesn't work either.
Dear Word Processor,
Thank you for your suggestion by automatically altering what I wrote, but you are always wrong, please stop
Sincerely, Just trying to format a paragraph
Dear math geeks,
9x - 7i > 3(3x - 7u)
Sincerely, i <3u
Dear websites ,
Please revise you're password system so I don't need a number,dash,symbol,gang sign to sign on
Dear Chemistry teacher,
We are taught our entire school careers that if math is easy, it is probably wrong. Please don't get upset and yell at us for being timid about chem problems. It's math with a ton of variables.
Sincerely, I don't like being yelled at
Dear Harper Lee,
Oh, you wrote TWO books now? Call me when you've written over 50.
Sincerely, Stephen King
Dear teacher and fellow students,
No, I didn't study for the test. Yes, I am one of the 5 students in the whole school who just got a 100% on that test that I didn't study for.
Sincerely, a skilled procrastinator who has luck with her intelligence
Dear Google street view car,
Thank you for your perfect timing
Sincerely, drove by as I was practicing marching in band
Dear Math Teachers..,
I still haven't used most of the stuff you taught us in school
Sincerely, I'm 50
Two wrongs don't make a right.
Sincerely, But three lefts do!
Dear people who lose or restore their faith in Humanity,
Why are you putting your faith in imperfect people in the first place?
Sincerely, God is always faithful
Please stop thinking that, just because I'm a single mother, I can weather all storms by myself all the time. Like everyone else, I need a crying shoulder or a listening ear every now and then, or someone to tell me "Let me fight this battle with you." I may be my child's hero, but I'm no Superwoman.
Sincerely, girl with acne-covered forehead.
Please be having a good day tomorrow.
Sincerely, Teenager with 4 extra teeth and anxiety