Girls don't want you to look like Ken
Sincerely, he doesn't have a penis
Dear guy speaking mad fast spanish,
Whoa, dude! Take it easy!
Sincerely, Dora didn't teach me that yet...
How did you manage to lift up my boob, and bite me?
Sincerely, This is a bloody awkward place to itch!
Dear people looking at me weird,
What? you haven't seen a 14 year old girl with a cape and a viking helmet ride freely on a trike before?
Sincerely, it's Wal-Mart, what did you expect?
Sincerely, Dr. Sheldon Cooper
Thank you ever so much for having all 28 of us use sharpies to make a chart that lasted the whole class period.
Sincerely, we walked out so high we saw unicorns
Dear English guys,
Girls may love your accent, but when I say "Potato", every uterus within a 50 mile radius explodes.
Sincerely, Irish guy
Dear everyone in the world,
When you fall, I will always be there for you
Sincerely, the floor
Please stop sending me funny texts at the completely wrong moment
Sincerely, laughing at a funeral...
Dear mean girls,
It's not that I hate you....I just hope you start your next period in a shark tank.
Dear dog I left at home for an hour,
Why would you eat the heel out of my sock, my sister's cellphone, 3 pine cones, and somehow the cat door?
Sincerely, none of those things seem remotely appetizing
You've managed to unlock my iPhone and beat my high score on temple run.
Sincerely, Teach Me Your Ways
Dear writers of The Lion King,
About that "Cats always land on their feet" thing...
Dear mall that put Victoria's Secret next to the maternity store,
That's really good placement.
Sincerely, nice one.
Dear guys who post pictures of themselves posing in the bathrooms with their abs,
If you're gonna do that, you might want to get rid of the power rangers towel behind you.
Sincerely, the towel is so much cooler than you