Dear automatic air fresheners,
Please stop sounding like someone sneezing. And PLEASE do not choose to do it during my midnight snack.
Sincerely, I almost crapped my pants.
Please keep in mind that side effects and allergies are NOT the same thing.
Sincerely, of course you're throwing up you take 10 drugs with the side effect of nausea/vomiting
Dear girls from the UK,
Do you like guys with American accents as much as girls here love guys with British accents?
Sincerely, just curious
Please stop giving me the "I'm worried you won't like this" face when you tell me you're making Shellroni for dinner
Sincerely, it's my favorite meal!
Dear people complaining about needing retail experience,
Most of you are people who say you're "above" fast food which actually counts as retail experience.
Sincerely, proud past McDonald's employee with a decent career in retail.