Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear great grandma,
No, I do not own any slaves...
Dear University of California application,
Please stop limiting my explanations about extracurriculars, jobs, awards, etc to 160 characters.
Dear guy who asked "so what did you have for dinner last night? Rice?",
Just because I'm Asian doesn't mean I eat rice every day...
Dear ladies who blame their insecurities on Disney,
Vogue? Fine. Cosmo? Fine. Hollywood? Fine. Cartoon animation of fairytales? Not sure I follow your logic...
Dear Lily,
Remember that time you touched my hair in fifth year? I haven't washed it since.
Dear bladder,
Please stop bursting 3 seconds before I get to the bathroom.
Dear Child complaining about long road trips,
Shut up! You have a DVD player and a portable game systems to keep you entertained!
Dear guys with hairy chests,
Go ahead and take v-necks out of your wardrobe.
Dear boy who used to bully me,
You're a football coach? I'm a Marine sniper.
Dear girls who go to the bathroom together,
We're pretty sure you have epic battles against trolls and badguys in there. That's why you never go in alone.
Dear guy I randomly flirted with on the street,
Since when are you in my geography class?!
Dear people who call me gay for being in a play,
Your girlfriends panties and bra match...
Dear kids making fun of my old cell phone,
Why don't we drop my phone and your iPhone from 4 inches off the ground and see whose phone is better then?
Dear gay community,
Please warn us that you are gay BEFORE we fall in love with you. Being smart, funny, nice, attractive, and a Thespian means that we are bound to love you.
Dear movies with underwater scenes,
I know the main character can't hold his breathe for that long.
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