Dear people at the table next to mine,
Please only talk about interesting topics.
Sincerely, bored eavesdropper.
Dear guy in the car next to me,
Thanks for blowing me a kiss even though it was a little creepy.
Sincerely, made my day anyway.
The silent treatment isn't really a punishment.
Dear room-mate watching Japanese anime,
Please explain why the characters' words don't match the movements of their mouths, and why there are abnormally shaped, floating, talking animals everywhere.
Sincerely, confused and slightly concerned.
Sincerely, sheltered private schooled kid.
It's 'cuz I'm black, isn't it?
Sincerely, a neglected blackboard.
If I watch the movie backwards, it tells the story of a decorated war hero who goes back home to get a sex change.
Sincerely, next I'm trying trying Lion King!
Dear general population,
When I said, "How stupid can you be?" - it wasn't meant as a challenge.
Dear jerk who prank called me at 2am,
I hope you don't mind that I put your number all over the internet.
Sincerely, doesn't do "forgiveness" well.
If it wasn't already obvious, we seat you next to the person you'd look best with.
Sincerely, yeah, I'm dating my lab partner, that's what we want to hear.
Please stop saying "OMG!" all the time. I hate prank calls.
Dear "Your connection cannot be found",
"Please visit the following website for further assistance".
Please stop with the talking ads that start on their own.
Sincerely, just had a heart attack.
Please, please, please, for the love of all that is holy, do NOT let this thing fall down on me.
Sincerely, wearing a strapless dress.