Dear boy who opened the door for me,
I'm sorry that I didn't notice you and went through the other door. Thank you for chasing me down, dragging me back into the building with you and making me go through the door while you held it.
Sincerely, You made my life...and now I have a crush on you!
You are just my oversized Sims game
Please keep singing in the shower, you're a hit on Youtube
Dear Weight Watchers,
You do realize your building is between a McDonald's and a donut place, right?
Sincerely, I'm not getting any skinnier
You're adorable, but please stop stepping on me while I'm lying down.
Sincerely, Ow! Not the boob!
Dear makers of cherry medicine,
Have you ever tasted a damn cherry?
Sincerely, the world
Dear twin sister,
I'll take your french final if you take my math final?
Sincerely, college here we come!
Please stop the period jokes
Sincerely, You're ovary acting
Dear "I wasnt that drunk",
You were going around the bar, dipping your fingers in wine and then rubbing people's foreheads and saying "simba!"
Sincerely, yeah you were pretty drunk
Dear iPhone auto-correction,
No, I actually spelled my friend's name correct. Do not change it!
Sincerely, "Happy birthday, vehicle!"
Dear Oxygen and Potassium,
Congrats on getting married. It may be none of my Bismuth, but your wedding wasn't great, it was OK.
Sincerely, a chemistry major.
Dear Ron Weasly,
No, there is not a potion that can cure ginger.
Dear 90's kids,
You're starting to sound like crusty old men who want kids off their lawn.
Sincerely, "When I was you're age..."
Please stop calling me black. It's "African-American" now.