I just need to get this off my chest. I am a man who was raped by a woman who is not going to prison because she’s female and I’m male; therefore, I must have enjoyed it. My rape is either completely ignored or, when it is acknowledged, made fun of. I am called a “fag” because men are supposed to always want sex, according to society and feminists. “Only men are rapists and only women are victims.” Why are you still allowing that lie to be perpetuated? Even now, I hide my identity out of fear of being mocked, ridiculed, and attacked by both men and women.
Dear loving parents,
Thank you for not getting me the $15 birthday present I asked for and then buying yourself a $60,000 car two days later.
Sincerely, your newly 16 year old daughter
Dear girl that makes fun of my friend,
He has feelings too. You barely know him and he's actually really cool, but you'll never know that because you're too busy judging him and making fun of him. He's even contemplated suicide because of people like you.
Sincerely, you make me sick
Please stop letting your friends park their cars on our front lawn. I get that our doors are right next to each other but the street is literally five feet from my door. Walking the extra five feet won't hurt. My yard already looks like crap without your friends' tire tracks all over it.
Sincerely, annoyed neighbor
Please stop calling me stupid, I am trying. I really want to be smart too.
Sincerely, That kid with the learning disability who studies for hours and hours a night just to be normal.
Please love me
Sincerely, I'm sorry if I have been a burden
Please Stop playing video games for a day and help me raise our kid. I love you, but I'm getting fed up.
Sincerely, Your girlfriend who is tired of feeling like a single parent
Dear frat house across from the practice field,
Please do not blast a metronome with a different tempo from what we're playing to screw us up. It was funny the first 5 minutes, not the whole hour and a half long rehearsal.
Sincerely, 380 band kids that now hate you
So my brother isn't hungry for dinner and you yell at me, saying it's my fault. I haven't even seen him all day!
Sincerely, I just can't win
Yes, I am just buying my two girls ice cream, and no, my son doesn't get any. He has been throwing a tantrum this entire day, while both of my daughters have been well behaved, so they get rewarded with ice cream, and he doesn't. Please do not try and undercut my authority by giving him a cone anyway.
Sincerely, A mother who uses proper parenting techniques
I don't like that you're secretly dating a priest. You're literally replacing my father with a Father.
Sincerely, Your Atheist daughter
Dear "can't you see we're talking?!",
Yes, I can. I can also see that you are standing in front of the store I want to enter, and that you just glared at me when I asked you to please move. So, yes, I am just going to push past you.
Sincerely, that "rude moron"
Dear Spanish teacher,
I really don't think it was necessary to tell me and my boyfriend to "get a room". Please calm down.
Sincerely, he literally just kissed my cheek.
The one time I actually wear makeup you criticize me!
Sincerely, no, eyeliner does not make me look goth
Dear kids at school,
Please stop acting like little kids. We're high schoolers, and there's no need to go around humping each other and pretending to slap the teacher's butt when she bends over to get something. Really? You guys suck.
Sincerely, a girl who actually goes to school to learn.