Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear tampon,
For such a small thing, you come with some big warnings....
Dear boyfriend,
When I say I wanna go see the muppets movie, its not code for lets make out in the back row for the whole movie.
Dear teachers,
I'm pretty sure going to the bathroom is a necessity, not a priviledge.
Dear person who said that a condom was too expensive to buy,
The average child costs 200,000 dollars to raise.
Dear Jersey Shore,
Please give me my little sister back.
Dear males,
Cologne is like the Ocean. It's awesome, fantastic, and smells great, but rather unpleasant to drown in.
Dear freshmen girls in my apartment,
It's really not attractive when you get drunk and lose all control over your bodily functions. No one thinks you're cute with puke on your shirt.
Dear newborn babies,
Welcome to our society. When you grow up, you will be judged on what you wear, which music you listen to, what you look like, how you act, who you hang around with, and on practically every other personal trait and imperfection about you, and you'll be made fun of for being who you are. Enjoy your stay.
Dear line of dirt on the floor,
WHY WON'T YOU COOPERATE?!
Dear Apple and Blackberry,
Have you ever considered teaming up to make the ultimate device?
Dear smokers,
No one wants to stand downwind of me, either.
Dear 4 year old cousin,
He asked you to hand him the "skin color" crayon, so you gave him tan, yellow, peach, brown, and black.
Dear Harry Potter,
Your mom died trying to protect you, too? We should be friends!
Dear extremely overweight women,
Please stop wearing clothes that would only fit if you were 100 pounds lighter.
Dear bubble wrap makers,
How do you get all the air into each individual bubble?
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