Dear cute lifeguards,
I hope you can't tell that I just farted.
Sincerely, making bubbles.
Dear people complaining about there being no flying cars yet,
Please think about all the people you have to avoid colliding with because they are incapable of driving straight in their own lane.
Sincerely, you really want to add another dimension?
Dear Charmin Brand toilet paper,
Aren't your commercials technically bear porn?
Sincerely, tee-hee... naked bears!
Dear math teacher,
If I had twenty candy bars and ate nineteen of them what do I have?