Forcing everyone with an Itunes account to own your new album doesn't make your album release the "biggest of all time"
Sincerely, nobody wanted your crappy free album anyways.
Dear "no excuse for pregnancy",
WHY ARENT YOU TELLING THIS TO THE BOYS TOO HUH? DID YOU EVER TAKE SEX ED? It takes mommy AND daddy parts to impregnate someone, and not all forms of birth control work all the time, even when used correctly. So go eff yourself
Sincerely, infuriated member of society
Dear girl in my english discussion group,
Please let me do my job that I was assigned. I appreciate you trying to help me make connections between the book we are reading and other things, but I only need a few connections, not a hundred connections on the SAME subject. You chose to have your job just like I chose mine, its not my fault your job is just to draw stinken pictures while the rest of us actually have to write things down.
Sincerely, your highly annoyed group connector
Please understand that I do listen to what you say and take it very much to heart. When I tell you words hurt, I really mean it and if you doubt that, I'll throw a dictionary at you.
Sincerely, changed your mind yet?
Dear parents that won't let me eat on the couch,
Exactly how often do you spill on your chair at the dinner table?
Sincerely, I'm eating at a coffee table
I hate you.
Sincerely, still procrastinating
When you go on a follow spree and actually follow us, I dont't think you don't know just how excited we can get.
Sincerely, I think my dad's ear is permanently damaged...
How is it we make the freaking toys,but you get all the credit?
Sincerely, The Elves
Dear experienced RN,
Please stop telling me I'll become as jaded as you, that I'll stop caring, and that there's no way I'll be able to stay nice and sweet. Don't talk down to me because I choose to see the good in people, that I choose to give them the benefit of the doubt, and that I choose to work my ass off to make them feel better. You can condescend all you want, I'm holding onto my naivete as long as I can. Because when I get to be like you, it'll be time to quit.
Sincerely, nursing student
Please keep trying to catch the fog. Really.
Sincerely, it's funny when you mist.
I'm so sorry you chose common sense as your dump stat. "Really, really wanting" a game isn't enough, you have to actually pre-order it to guarantee you get one.
Sincerely, the sold out, "moron" game clerk
Dear gun advocates,
I'm not here to say ban all guns. In fact, I'm not trying to say anything about the right to gun ownership. But giving a 9 year old a uzi? Shouldn't there be a line somewhere?
Sincerely, it was an accident waiting to happen...
Dear women who claim to hate men,
If you hate men so much, why are you still sleeping with them?
Dear People who have cars or bikes with loud motors ,
Please refrain from using that vehicle after 11pm
Sincerely, can't sleep if all I hear is VROOM VROOM