Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear girls who constantly complain about boys who stare at their cleavage,
Just an idea, wear your boobs on the inside of your shirt.
Dear high school "Dance Team",
No, seriously, we appreciate you. Our country needs future strippers, too!
Dear cleaning lady,
Please start putting our sheets on the right beds.
Dear smart student in my class,
I'm sorry I keep putting below average students next to you so they can cheat off your paper.
Dear gay guys,
We straight guys are sometimes mean to you, but it is only because you can drink those fruity beverages at a bar without judgment.
Dear girl who "overslept",
So you had enough time to coat your face with an inch of makeup but you didn't have enough time to put on actual clothes?
Dear "guns kill people",
Yeh... Spoons make people fat, and pens misspell words.
Dear girls in my school,
Facebook asked "what's on your mind," not "what's under your shirt?"
Dear teenagers,
If you can't bend over in it, then it's not a dress.
Dear Christians,
Please act like Christ, we're tired of correcting you.
Dear guy staring at me,
Yes, I'm playing Pokemon. Yes, I'm also pretty.
Dear hot guy at the gym,
Please refrain from removing your wedding ring before working out, so I don't make a complete fool of myself because I think you're single.
Dear customer,
When you pay with a generous amount of one dollar bills we automatically assume you're a stripper.
Dear girls who wear lots of glitter eyeshadow,
You leave me no choice but to rate you from Ke$ha to Edward.
Dear Ken,
Barbie can't bend her legs, have fun with that.
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