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ALL TIME
Dear Newton,
For every male action, there is a female overreaction.
Dear Mom,
The fact that you just said you would let me try my first shot on my 21st birthday.....
Dear Comrade Obama,
This is a capitalist society, not a communist dictatorship.
Dear Girl at my School,
You say you are pansexual. You say you don't identify with any particular gender (because you have none) and that you don't have any sexual preference. And yet, you have only ever had boyfriends and you go to an all-girl's high school.
Dear Women,
Why must you always bend down in front of me and then accuse me of starring at you butt
Dear people who say they're kids at heart,
Please grow up. Being young at heart means you find wonder and fun in the world. Being a kid means you're immature and childish, and probably won't be able to keep a decent job
Dear "I support gay rights why can't you?",
Oh I don't know, maybe because people all believe different things? Forcing your belief on those who disagree with it is just as bad as those trying to force their belief on you.
Dear society,
I'm a 17 year old girl who drinks, smokes, goes to parties, and has lost her virginity. Oh, and I'm a straight A student who got all 5s (highest score) on her Advanced Placement tests, a 2280 on her SAT, and is loyal to her family above all.
Dear angry girls,
Just because you need tampons/pads, doesn't mean they should be free. Everyone needs toilet paper too, but you don't see anyone protesting for that to be free.
Dear person complaining about the "fat american stereotype",
Please realize its not that much of a stereotype
Dear Porn,
Although you look amazing and feel amazing sometimes, you make me feel shameful immediately. I am not alone. It is not normal to look at you. You destroy relationships and are killing my marriage. I hate that you're not illegal.
Dear New hire at work,
Thank you so much for letting us all in on your belief in UFO's, Aliens, and backing it up with stupid conspiacy theories. Good to know right away that I don't want you on any of my projects!
Dear Overwieght Person on the Bus,
Please don't sit on me. Yes, that seat next to me is available, but, no, you will not fit in it.
Dear jerk that keeps parking in my spot at work,
Please keep your car out of my spot. Oh and lace up your Nike's you have got to run to catch upp with the tow truck
Dear People Who Complain About Spelling and Grammer,
U r lyk the whyn conasewers ov th inglish luggage. Keep it up. Your reactions are hillarious.
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