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THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear teacher saying hi to me in the hall,
I know you are a cool teacher but you are still a teacher.
Dear people who use arguments from Leviticus for and against homosexuality,
Pretty much everything in Leviticus is now ignored because it is in the Old Testament, which Jesus said was no longer applicable. However, 1 Corinthians 6 is against homosexuality, and because it is in the New Testament, people follow it.
Dear "Don't like it don't watch it",
Dude, you're talking about porn. It is virtually impossible to not watch porn in this "liberated" society we live in. It pervades practically everything, so no, I'm sorry; I can't follow your advice.
Dear people who say they hate their parents,
My parents were verbally abusive and neglectful. I can still say I love and forgive them.
Dear new adjunct history teacher,
Please don't tell your Asian students that their eyes are shaped that way so they can survive the Ice Age. You must not have been told that the students fill out a teacher evaluation survey at the end of every term.
Dear Americans,
Please stop using the phrase "British Accent" to describe the voices of English people. It's really not helping the ignorant American stereotype.
Dear Roommate,
Please know that I can actually hear you when you sing in the shower....
Dear Ex Boyfriend,
Please know that you can still hold the door for me. It's just common courtesy.
Dear people who think J. K. Rowling can write another book for the harry potter series,,
Please realise that she can't because of quite a few things. 1. She tied up everything around the number 7 and she can't go and ruin it. 2. Also writing another book would go against the last three words of Harry Potter book 7: "All was well."
Dear guy who obviously likes me and all of our friends know it,
Hurry up and ask me out already!! I happen to like you too.
Dear American Police,
Please stop using your status as being police to commit acts of violence in public
Dear Fourth Grade Bully,
Karma's a bitch huh?
Dear 'Guns kill people',
Guns don't kill people, people kill people.
Dear Driver of a Silver Prius,
Please forgive me for putting a tiny dent in your car when I opened my door. I don't have insurance and my parents wouldn't let me tell you because we couldn't afford to have it fixed. :(
Dear World,
Gay means happy, queer means weird, and fag means cigarette.
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