Dear guy I slept with last night,
Thank you for being the nicest most polite guy I have ever met. You even made me breakfast
Sincerely, I wish I would have given you my number now
Thanks for taking care of the people we fucked the homes of.
Relax, the gays don't want to marry you.
Sincerely, out and proud lesbian
Dear women who say men shouldn't be grossed out by periods,
It is pretty gross.
Sincerely, and I've had to deal with them for the last 15 years of my life!
Dear "change the legal drinking age to 18 in America",
The reason the drinking age is 21 is because there's speculation that before that age certain important parts of our brains are still in the development process.
Sincerely, the more you know
I thought you said that music was your life and I was the melody? Did you skip a beat because suddenly I'm not with you.
Sincerely, Your ex
Dear U.S. School System,
Please make it a high school graduation requirement to pass the citizenship test.
Sincerely, it's scary how little many people know about our own country
I seriously hate your mother.
Sincerely, your ex-girlfriend to be if she keeps up "the good work".
Dear gay friends who criticize me for being Christian,
You ask me not to judge you for your life choices, so please don't judge me for mine
Sincerely, it goes both ways
Yes I am judging you when you buy $20 worth of Redbulls with your food stamps, then alcohol and cigarettes with cash!
Sincerely, Cashier ringing you up, who barely makes enough money to pay her bills working full time!!!!
Dear users of this fine website,
Please understand that, as a moderator, I allow certain posts through that are incredibly stupid or nonsensical at times. Why? Because I can't wait to see what the comments section for those posts will look like.
Sincerely, a moderator.
Just because I am American, it does not mean I am fat, stupid, gun-toting, racist, homophobic, or generally ignorant. Please don't hate me for my country's stereotypes.
Sincerely, SLIGHTLY overweight, stupid, gun-toting american.
Please stay strong and remember you aren't in this alone. We know how it feels to be targeted by hate groups and such, we've built their railroads and dams for them and then they says we "should go back to where we came from" before attacking us and hurling insults. Then once we started getting use to the US, they come back and start calling us Communists because the people across the pond who happen to look like us are Communists. Stay strong and hopeful, I promise you that not everyone in America is a racist, misinformed bigot :)
Please stop keeping unhealthy food in the house. Yes, I understand that willpower is important. But it is really hard to have it when there is tempting food right under your nose, all the time.
Sincerely, your daughter who's dealing with a weight problem.