SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear Lefties,
Do you realize that whatever hand you write with, it's going to be challenging to write on one side of a spiral notebook?
Dear red light traffic camera haters,
Please shut up. The only reasons you want the cameras gone is because you have been caught running the red lights, causing accidents, and being stupid while driving. The cameras have helped prevent accidents and other keep other safe drivers from problem drivers.
Dear Professor patronizing at me for texting while walking,
I was texting the campus Chaplin to tell her that my best friend just beat cancer.
Dear teacher,
If If I get docked five points for handing something in late, what happens to you when it takes a month to give me my test back?
Dear everyone,
Unless your S/O has cheated on you, or you have definite reason to suspect he or she is, you NEVER have any right to check their phone, email, or social media.
Dear gay people,
If I hide the fact that I'm straight, what is "the closet" called?
Dear supporters of racial equality,
Please remember that equality will mean ZERO discrimination. That means, eventually, you need to learn to stop being "proud" of being black or native or otherwise. The point of equality is transcending ethnicity and being proud of being "human", in having choices.
Dear LGBTQ community,
Please understand, I'm totally cool with you loving whoever. Love is love. Just don't make out in public, trying to start something.
Dear people,
I was wrong. I was wrong about racism in America. I know that now, and I'm ready to make a change. I just wanted you to know that I've learned so much, and there IS hope.
Dear angry people,
Separating church and state doesn't mean removing every religious symbol from anything outside of a church. That's actually denying all the devout Freedom of Religion.
Dear US and MD politicians who want to bring illegal immigrants in,
There's so much gang violence and crime in inner city Baltimore that our kids can't even play outside. We can’t take out the trash without locking the door. You're spending billions on illegals, but what about our neighborhoods? Where can we get asylum? Where can we get refugee status?
Dear world,
If men could get pregnant, there'd be abortion clinics on every corner.
Dear Ellen Degeneres,
If you're going to criticize the media's unrealistic body standards so much, then please stop bringing so many male models onto your show.
Dear everyone,
We should just let gay people get married; marriage is a joke anyway. People marry for tax benefits or because they think they're in “love,” and 50% of marriages end in divorce anyway. Gay people can't possibly ruin the institution of marriage any more than the celebrities whose "marriages" lasted less than 24 hours.
Dear dog,
Please stop pooping in my neighbors yard while there watching you
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