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Dear Potty-Training Nephew,
If you have to go to the bathroom, please notify an adult... especially if you are going to be sitting on laps.
Dear skinny girls,,
Just because I weigh 110 pounds and you weigh 85 doesn't mean I'm fat.
Dear AP World teacher,
Please stop complimenting me on my study schedule, and how you wish more students were as "diligent" as me. When you asked how my grades had gotten so high so quickly after them being so low, and I told you how I had started scheduling time for panic attacks while studying. You should not take this as a good thing
Dear guy who lives down the hall,
Please next time you see me using a feature on my phone you don't like, keep it to yourself. Chewing me out for having a phone you deem "inferior" and then telling me to never use that feature in front of you again was very uncalled for.
Dear Technology,
You mean to tell me we've come up with nuclear bombs yet we can't find a way to get rid of the painfully awkward lag on news channels when going to someone "on the scene"?
Dear customer,
If you dont' want tomatoes on your burger, just ask us not to put them on. If you tell us you are allergic to tomatoes, then yes, we are going to remove both the tomatoes and the ketchup, because, guess what, ketchup is made from tomatoes.
Dear math teacher,
Why do you make fun of me in class when I don't understand something?
Dear homework,,
I always win
Dear world,
Please learn that there is a BIG difference between "retarded" and "stupid" and when this difference is ignored, people's feelings get hurt.
Dear Santa,
I thought we agreed on December
Dear Sink Fairy,
Please be real. Wave your magic wand over those who put the dishes in the sink in the first place. Then you wouldn't have to visit so often.
Dear Ladies sitting next to me at Panera,
Please don't talk about me. I know I don't look the best, but I have my reasons.
Dear people who call me a hipster,
Please stop calling me one, I wear beanies because I am a little bitch when it comes to the cold.
Dear Dad,
Thank you for singing Mom the song that you sang her on your wedding day 17 years ago. That made both of our days.
Dear smokers at the bus stop,
Thank you for putting them out
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