I Binged your girlfriend.
Sincerely, and she said "Yahoo!"
Dear straight boy who said "you'd look better without makeup",
I highly doubt that.
Sincerely, a drag queen
Dear Guy complementing me,
Oh, my chest looks nice in this shirt? Well, your dick looks look nice in those jeans.
Sincerely, You should have seen your face
Dear Justin Timberlake,
We're very sorry but you cannot return sexy unless you have a receipt.