Dear Starbucks employee,
Please tell me why abbreviation is such a long word
Sincerely, Oh, so you aren't an English major? Oops
Dear people who invented energy drinks,
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Sincerely, students everywhere.
I can make you a non-vegan rather quickly!
Sincerely, Poisonus Snake Bite!
Dear annoyed people,
I like my women like my coffee; fine-ground, with a little creamer, some cinnamon, nutmeg, cardamom and vanilla.
Sincerely, that was supposed to be a joke, but it's actually kinda true...
Please realise that being anorexic was not an actual choice. It started as me cutting down on snacks to eat healthier, but then I started looking in the mirror and I started hating what I saw...the stomach, the thighs, the fatty arms...and I just stopped eating..I'm so sorry
Sincerely, an all too true reality
Please aim at the toilet... Not the wall.
Sincerely, girl who hates the unisex bathroom at her work.
Dear ignorant classmate,
So... Remind me again why it's a problem that I like both men and women.
Sincerely, you're angry and I get the best of both worlds. Have fun with that.
Dear "Be serious!",
Sincerely, last time I tried that a clown came at me with a razor.
You're a spineless, pale, pathetic lot...
Dear geeky guy who texts me,
Please don't stop texting me, it makes me smile 20x more plus you're cute
Sincerely, the hopeless romantic
Dear Insomniac of a Neighbor,
Why in God's name do you think it's a good idea to mow your lawn at 1 am?
Sincerely, Tired and Grumpy Resident.
You might be fun to play with, and good for babies. But when you are start hurting for no reason, I don't like you.
Sincerely, girls everywhere.
Please move the : and the ; buttons farther apart.
Sincerely, I just made that text VERY awkward.
Dear 9 year old sister,
Next time we're at the community center, please try not to say "Mommy, what's a cone-dom?" so loudly.
Sincerely, I love you, sis :)