For every male action, there is a female overreaction.
Sincerely, Third Law of Emotion
Dear Comrade Obama,
This is a capitalist society, not a communist dictatorship.
Sincerely, The Ghost of Reagan
You could of told me that you were pregnant before you got the abortion. It was my choice too.
Sincerely, Always wondering father
Dear men who shave,
Please stop being such little babies about your face and how it burns and makes you sore. You know that your grandad probably used one crazy-kill-you-dead-if-you-mess-up-sharp-ass-blade and never complained?
Sincerely, and I bet you post about "real men" all the time too
Dear Dudes trying to hit on me,,
If you know who John Eggbert,Ask Ketchum, Nibbles, Bean the Dynamite, Kiku Honda, and Princess Luna are and have an awesome sense of humor then it might happen.
Sincerely, Yeah Im a nerd. No Im not desperate
Unless your S/O has cheated on you, or you have definite reason to suspect he or she is, you NEVER have any right to check their phone, email, or social media.
Sincerely, that's how breakups happen
I was wrong. I was wrong about racism in America. I know that now, and I'm ready to make a change. I just wanted you to know that I've learned so much, and there IS hope.
Sincerely, white girl who finally realized her privilege
We should just let gay people get married; marriage is a joke anyway. People marry for tax benefits or because they think they're in “love,” and 50% of marriages end in divorce anyway. Gay people can't possibly ruin the institution of marriage any more than the celebrities whose "marriages" lasted less than 24 hours.
Remember that time we tried to put our names in the Goblet of Fire? I wish that wasn't the only time that we'd see each other old.
Dear talent show contestants below the age of 7,
You try to convince the world you're cute and all, singing/dancing your little hearts out, but all I see is a another life down the drain of money, fame and greed. Plus, you're far too young to handle the stress of fame, and it's a gruesome shame your parents don't realize that.
Sincerely, annoyed by seeing life's destroyed that young, and annoyed by anyone who calls it cute.
Dear daughter who hates every food that I cook,
Cook your own food. Here's money for groceries.
Sincerely, tired of your picky eating.
Dear politicians who wrote the ACA,
The vasectomy is the most safe and effective form of birth control that exists for either sex. Why the hell isn't its coverage required by the ACA? ...oh yeah, I forgot: birth control and family planning is only about women.
Sincerely, pissed off
why is it okay for Adele to make an album about her breakups but people make fun of Taylor swift for doing it?
Sincerely, think about it, they are doing the same thing
Dear little kids,
Did you really think sledding down and ice covered hill was going to end well? Neither did I.
Sincerely, Amused neighbor
Dear man on the street,
Please reconsider the claim that you're "making my day" by spewing sexist slurs as I pass. I am worth so much more than my body. I am beauty, I am ancestry, I am faults and flaws and hunger. I am both woman and person, and I am not here for your pleasure.