Dear Christian conservatives fighting my abortion,
The doctors have told me that there is a 100% chance that my son would come into this world with a brain condition that would cause him unrelenting, unavoidable physical pain.
Sincerely, this is killing me, but abortion is the more humane option.
Dear new hire,
Yeah, I'm a girl. I've also been shopping her for the past seven years, and I've become good friends with the manager. Guess whose going to come out on top when I tell him about you trying to charge me 30 bucks for a 7 dollar game?
Sincerely, better fix your attitude
Dear best friend's mom,
You don't deserve to have him for a son. He has done nothing but overcome the obstacles you've placed in front of him, while you sit on your ass and criticize every decision he makes. He's twenty, let him live his life on his own. He did it for two years.
Sincerely, your son's pissed off friend.
Dear Best Guy Friend,
Please realize that I don't care if your girlfriend is watching. When you come home from the army, I am giving you THE biggest hug ever, and not letting go.
Sincerely, you haven't even left yet and I'm worried.
Dear 'Annoyed Europeans',
We know that British people, French people and German people don't fit stereotypes. Consequently, not all Americans are idiots like you imply.
Sincerely, Annoyed Americans
Dear Australians and Hawaiians,
Sometimes we just have to let it go, there are stereotypes everywhere.
Sincerely, the Canadians that ride moose to school, and have pet polar bears waiting in their igloos.
Dear guy walking down the street,
What do you and Macy's have in common?
Sincerely, your pants are half off.
Dear person who put the hogwarts letter in my locker,
I have bought all my books my broomstick and I will be leaving on April 21, all I need is my owl which you will send me and my ticket for platform for 9 3/4
Sincerely, you made my day now bring the owl... I'm waiting
If I was fine without you before I met you, I will be fine without you now. People come and go.
Sincerely, ignoring me and throwing me disgusted looks isnt going to do anything.
Dear Old Lady across the street,
Please stop glaring at me as I push a pram up the street
Sincerely, I'm 15. The child is my niece.
Dear whoever just pulled the fire alarm,
Are you aware that it's 2 degrees out?
Sincerely, you have to stand outside, too...
Please lower the volume when watching internet porn. My bedroom has the same vent as the basement.
Sincerely, your adult kid.
No I do not spell it CDO
Sincerely, not all forms of OCD are the same
Dear toilet company's ,
Please make it so your toilets have a silent flush between the hours of 8pm and 8am
Sincerely, shhhh, shhhh, SHHHHH