Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear mom,
There's a HUGE difference between 6:55 and 7:00 am.
Dear Dory,
Whenever I'm hiking or biking and get tired, I hum "Just Keep Swimming."
Dear dogs,
I have new found respect for you.
Dear Britain,
It wasn't our decision to call it Sorcerer's Stone, we don't understand why they changed it either.
Dear man who gave up his seat on the train for me,
You will never know how much brighter you made my really crappy day with that simple act.
Dear boy who keeps asking if I'd like to "bang",
Yes, I'd like to bang...your face into a wall
Dear girls on the subway at 2 a.m.,
Please don't assume I'm "totally smashed" just because I'm nodding off.
Dear Mr. Clean commercials,
We get that your product works, but could you please clean the rest of the counter?
Dear reality TV shows,
Please explain why you have a "writer."
Dear girl on the floor above me,
I see you have a new boyfriend, and by see I mean hear.
Dear SunnyD,
If you have 100% of my daily Vitamin C, why aren't you called SunnyC?
Dear Facebook,
Please never make an application that notifies you who's looking at your profile.
Dear sneeze,
If you're gonna happen, happen. Don't put a stupid look on my face and leave it at that.
Dear Santa,
If I ask for coal, and I've been naughty, what do I get?
Dear mom,
It gets to a certain point when sending me to bed early is no longer a punishment.
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