Dear people in their cars that honk.0034 seconds after the light turns green,
I swear to God, if you do it again, I will turn off my car, sit on the hood, and feed birds for an hour.
Sincerely, pissed off driver
Sincerely, people everywhere
Yes, I see you checking yourself out in the shop windows.
Sincerely, amused driver.
Dear Cheating Ex- Boyfriend,
You are the reason that I bought a female dog named Karma.
Sincerely, Careful... She bites
Dear Head and Shoulders Shampoo,
Please make a soap called knees and toes.
Sincerely, And while you're at it, make a face wash called eyes, ears, mouth and nose
Dear Carrie Underwood,
We give you props, but next time maybe you shouldn't carve your name in the seats. It's a dead giveaway.
Sincerely, the police department
Dear roommate who left for a week to Iowa,
Thank you for leaving me completely unsupervised and in ownership of a big screen TV, surround sound speakers, and all eight Harry Potter movies.
Sincerely, DOBBY NEVER MEANT TO KILL! DOBBY ONLY MEANT TO MAIM, OR SERIOUSLY INJURE!
I'm not mad that you didn't get me a present; I'm just kinda disappointed that you forgot about my birthday...
Sincerely, your twin.
Please refrain from using the phrase 'booyah'. There is only one person that can pull that off.
Sincerely, Ron Stoppable
Dear girl with a flashlight shopping at Abercrombie,
You made my day
Yes, the mailman has come to kill us all. Thanks for the warning.
Sincerely, your owner who nearly had a heart attack.
I liked you better in my soup.
Sincerely, confused algebra student
Dear identical twin ,
You should have seen your face...
Sincerely, oh wait. I can show you.
Dear Aunt who bought me a Rubix Cube,
Sincerely, your color blind niece