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Dear hipsters and emos,
I was a tortured poet before it was cool.
Dear three impossibilities of the world,
Can't count your hair, can't wash your eyes with soap, and can't stick out your tongue and breathe out of your mouth...
Dear parents,
You want me to pay for my own things... but won't let me get a job?
Dear teachers,
Please tell me how the heck I got that wrong?! It was an OPINION question!
Dear Verizon commercial,
If I had the choice between a new smart phone and R2-D2, I wouldn't pick the phone.
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