Dear 911 operator,
What do you mean, you won't help? What kind of emergencies will you help with?!
Sincerely, there's a massive bulldog attacking a highschool girl and her tiny dog! Don't hang up on me!
Dear boy who just called me emo,
I saw you kissing a guy the other day. You're lucky I'm nice.
Sincerely, some people just suck. (no pun intended)
Dear Sleeping Beauty,
How did your parents come up with that name?
Sincerely, so creative
Dear JK Rowling,
Thank you for our childhood.
Sincerely, Children of 1988-1998 (The Harry Potter Generation)
Dear girls who complain about having long distance relationships,
At least you found love in this hopeless place
Sincerely, all the single ladies all the single ladies
Dear the person who wrote my name on my birth certificate,
Why did you have to leave out the L?
Sincerely, Li-am A. Pineapple, now I-am A. Pineapple
Dear December 21 2012,
If you aren't going to be the end of the world, there are going to be a lot of babies born on September 20, 2012.
Sincerely, overpopulating the world
Dear Government,
What happens in my womb is none of your business
Sincerely, Pro Choice
Dear Hogwarts,
How do you not have teen pregnancies?
Sincerely, 16 and pregnant
Dear J.K. Rowling,
If Cho Chang is a year older than Harry Potter, why does she still go to Hogwarts during his seventh year?
Sincerely, Common Sense
Dear Folger's Coffee commercial,
Do you have to make your holiday commercial so emotional? I just cried.
Sincerely, missing my brother, and hoping he can come home for Christmas.
Dear hiccups,
Please tell me why you find it neccessary to visit at 12:30 AM?
Sincerely, I just wanted to go to sleep.
Dear high school girls,,
Are you happy now?
Sincerely, she's gone forever
Dear girlfriend who "likes it rough",
Please consider dating a porn star instead.
Sincerely, terrified of hurting you
Dear Girl I like,
Please Break up with your boyfriend
Sincerely, Friendzoned but the third time's the charm
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