I've noticed that all five of your girlfriends sound exactly the same
Sincerely, I think you're all dating the same girl
I hate you. That is all.
Sincerely, an annoyed and tired high school senior.
Dear teenagers who post their whole life on Facebook,,
I don't care about your McDonald's run with "your girlsss<33"
Sincerely, who takes a picture of themselves in McDonald's?
Dear old couple holding hands,
Please let that be me in 40 years.
Sincerely, 20 in a young relationship
Dear people who mess with my touch-screen phone,
Sincerely, obsessively compulsed owner of the phone
Dear girl who started texting me first,
Sorry if I make up a lame excuse to stop texting you, but you just aren't very interesting.
Sincerely, Lol and Awh don't fuel a conversation
Dear people at Firehouse subs (and similar fast food places),
Just because I am wearing shorts and a leotard doesn't mean I am slut.
Sincerely, gymnasium right down the street
Dear "Are you on drugs?",
"No. I don't do drugs." "Oh no, that's what the website said you would say,".
Dear Person who called me gay for having a lisp,
I have been in speech therapy since I was four.
Sincerely, Im not gay
Why is gay marriage even an issue?!
Dear people running to catch a bus or train,
Please know that whenever I see you I silently cheer for you to get to the stop before the bus or train does.
Dear optimist, pessimist and realist,,
Please remember whilst you were arguing over the glass of water, I drank it.
Sincerely, the opportunist.
Please stop telling me that I'm being disrespectful when I "talk back", when you do the exact same thing to everyone that talks to you.
Sincerely, Teenage daughter trying to defend herslef
Dear friend who said "pretty please with a cherry on top",
So you're going to say please, and then try to kill me? I see how it is.
Sincerely, allergic to cherries and not giving you any money.