Dear child proof containers ,
Sincerely, teens and adults everywhere
Dear Replay button,
why couldn't you have been invented for the car radio.
Sincerely, really loved that song that just ended
Please put shows on tv that people actually want to watch.
Sincerely, I want to be entertained
Dear English teacher that let us watch The Lion King,
You said it was for our Hamlet project. We will still sing hakuna matata.
Sincerely, you can sing, too
Dear 125 lb friend,
Please stop calling yourself fat and saying you need to diet.
Sincerely, tired of reassuring you of how skinny you are
Dear Michigan weather,
Sincerely, Texas weather
Love isn't that great of a drug. Call me if you want to try something better.
Sincerely, Charlie Sheen.
Dear ice cream,
I don't care what people think. I want you inside me.
Yeah, well we invented Google.
Dear Non-Experienced Bakers,
When making a cheesecake, always check the label of the cream cheese.
Sincerely, Mmmm Garlic Cheesecake. My favorite.
I have never been more disgusted with you. When you said a kid with special needs wasn't perfect or pretty, I realized that you weren't as "perfect" as you make yourself seem.
Sincerely, No I do not want to spend the rest of the day with you
Dear dentist office right next to the ice cream store,,
I see what you did there..
Dear average guys,,
Its 10:00 on saturday night and what am i doing? watching tv in my sweats while eating chinese takeout.
Sincerely, yeah, im cool like that.
Dear girl at my catholic school,
I think wearing your skirt to your mid-calves is long enough.
Sincerely, What are you Amish?