Dear Girls who want big boobs,
Please stop talking
Sincerely, 19 year old wearing grandma bras
Dear chatty office manager,
I had to stop working because you've been talking to me non-stop for the past half hour with no sign of stopping. I can't multi-task that well.
Sincerely, if I get yelled at for not getting anything done, I'm pulling an Office Space.
Dear person whom I met at the Latin poem reciting competition,
Thank you for comforting me when I thought I had done badly. I'm sorry I didn't appreciate your support.
Sincerely, a proud 4th-place winner
Dear cookie butter,
Will you marry me?
Dear Harry Potter,
Thank you for being my safe place...
Sincerely, 18 and still in a POTTERHEAD
Dear friend who killed the tarantula in my house,
That was my brother's pet. I told you that multiple times.
Sincerely, grounded for a week.
What's the opposite of a ladies' man?
Sincerely, I'm pretty sure it's not a man-lady...
STOP KILLING OUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS FOR FUN
Dear People of the World,
Please I don't want to sound slutty or anything, but feel free to use me whenever you want
Yes, My favortie color is black. I love skulls. I'm pretty creepy. But that doesn't mean I want to be goth!
Sincerely, You're totally not goth daughter. Seriously. It doesn't mean anything.
Dear "popular girls",
Before you judge the "cat freak" you should get to know her first
Sincerely, she is my awesome best friend
You know I like you, why won't you say anything?
Sincerely, stop flirting if you don't mean it
Dear Owl City,
Y U NO release Beautiful Mystery?!
Sincerely, That was your best song ever!
You can't get from D.C. to Norfolk in 30 minutes. It's a 5 hour drive.
Sincerely, Native Washingtonian
Dear Mr Penn Jillette,
Please win apprentice for all those out there who need inspiration to continue on with life...
Sincerely, Some one who is after inspiraton