Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely, Unicorns
Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely, Logic
Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely, anonymous.
Dear icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Enjoy the Karma...
Sincerely, the Titanic.
Dear Mom,
Im 16 now, can I PLEASE get a bra?
Sincerely, your son, Justin B
Dear Students,
I know when you're texting.
Sincerely, No one just looks down at their crotch and smiles
Dear Boyfriend,
I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you can.
Sincerely, Spiders
Dear person reading this,
You're here because you're actively procrastinating or avoiding real work, aren't you? It's OK...me too.
Sincerely, I'll work tomorrow
Dear 6,
Please stop spreading rumors about me eating 9. You shouldn't be talking. I hear you guys do some pretty nasty things.
Sincerely, 7
Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely, Canada
Dear Buffy,
We have a new assignment for you. His name is Edward.
Sincerely, anonymous.
Dear Twilight fans,
Thank you for making us look sane and well-adjusted.
Sincerely, Trekkies.
Dear Waldo,
Please return my invisibility cloak ASAP.
Sincerely, H. Potter
Dear Nickelback,
That's enough.
Sincerely, the world.
Dear Edward Cullen,
Avada Kedavra!
Sincerely, Tom Riddle
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