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Dear DBPB,
Jean Claude Van Dam, Steven Segal, and Arnold Schwarzenagger all decide to go out trick-or-treating as musical composers for Halloween. They go into a costume store and look for masks. Jean Claude sees a costume that he likes and says, "I think I'll go as Beethoven." Steven Segal sees a costume that grabs his attention and says, "I'll be Mozart." Arnold had a tough time finding a costume that he liked, but he eventually found one that appeased his interest. He picks up a costume and said, "I'll be Bach."
Dear birds,
You get to poop on people's cars and get away with it?
Dear girls,
Do you really want a knight in shining armor?
Dear men,
Please keep telling women to get back in the kitchen
Dear Everyone,
I have a confession. I actually did choose the thug life.
Dear humans of the world,
Why do you blame us for stealing all of your things when you can't find them? Is it because we're black?
Dear hormones,
I said I want bigger TITS not ZITS
Dear guy sitting next to me,
I can see you cheating off my answers on the test
Dear bully from high school, ,
No I don't expect to be your boss,
Dear Parents,
Please rethink what you you just said.
Dear hormones,
Please don't make our owner fall in love with that guy. Don't. Don't. STOP! Aaand she's in love. Brace yourselves.
Dear DBPB,
What comes with the new Divorced Barbie??
Dear Viewers,
Why WOULDN'T I touch the butt? Butts are great!
Dear customer,
Please stop talking, stop thinking, and pay attention. Take all of those preconceived notions, your irrational anger and the stick up your a**, bundle them all up, and throw them away in that trash can. All done and ready to listen? OK. We. Do. Not. Sell. That. Item. Here.
Dear Noah ,
Oh crap... Was that today
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