Dear curious people,
My identical twin sister and I attempted to go into each others class posing as the other because I hated that class but she loved it, and vice versa. We were anxious and feared getting caught, but tried it anyways. Upon arrival, I went to her seat and tried to not seem nervous. But today we had a sub, so I wasn't so scared anymore. When the sub took attendance, she called my sisters name, and I responded. The sub looked at me and said I wasn't her.
Sincerely, the sub that day was our mom.
Aren't you supposed to be popular? Why do I have to buy your friends and boyfriend?
Dear Pot Dealers,
Thank You for supporting home cooked meals. Also, I broke my last pot.
Sincerely, Wait? You're selling drugs?
Dear chain letter I didn't forward in middle school,
I choose to blame you for my relationship status.
Dear ramdom girl in my math class,
"Umm, he's my twin brother..."
Sincerely, "You two make such a cute couple!"
Damn right I'm good in bed
Sincerely, I can sleep for days
Dear people that write "bestfriend",
Hello. My name is Señor Spacebar. You killed proper syntax.
Sincerely, Prepare to die!
Please stop calling the police because of the huge black man thats following you. Thats your shadow.
Sincerely, 911 Operator.
If you're ever feeling down, just remember… You've won as many Oscars as Leonardo DiCaprio! Damn, you're good.
Found you, bitch.
Sincerely, good at math
We have a saying that goes, "If someone talks to you on the streets, he's either drunk, insane, or American."
Why didn't you make me pancakes? You asked for a command, and I gave you one.
Sincerely, your disappointed owner
I'm sorry we haven't been seeing much of each other lately. The truth is . . . well, I've found someone else.
Sincerely, I've started seeing the Internet