Dear curious people,
My identical twin sister and I attempted to go into each others class posing as the other because I hated that class but she loved it, and vice versa. We were anxious and feared getting caught, but tried it anyways. Upon arrival, I went to her seat and tried to not seem nervous. But today we had a sub, so I wasn't so scared anymore. When the sub took attendance, she called my sisters name, and I responded. The sub looked at me and said I wasn't her.
Sincerely, the sub that day was our mom.
Aren't you supposed to be popular? Why do I have to buy your friends and boyfriend?
Dear Forever 21,
Please don't take it personally, but I'm feeling 22.
Sincerely, T. Swift
Dear "big boobs don't count if you're fat",
Neither does a big dick if half of it's your personality.
Sincerely, Girls everywhere
Dear chain letter I didn't forward in middle school,
I choose to blame you for my relationship status.
Dear Spring Allergies,
DISHONOR ON YOU! DISHONOR ON YOUR COW! DISHONOR ON YOUR WHOLE FAMILY!
Sincerely, a springtime sufferer
Why must you force your way out in very public over crowded situations and why 9 times out of 10 must you be loud? Everyone in the elevator was looking me like I just crapped a starfish. I'm happy to let you out any other time, I just need notice is all.
Sincerely, the girl who farts like a Clydesdale
Please stop calling the police because of the huge black man thats following you. Thats your shadow.
Sincerely, 911 Operator.
Damn right I'm good in bed
Sincerely, I can sleep for days
Dear Geology Department,
Geology is not a real science.
Sincerely, Dr. Sheldon Cooper
If you're ever feeling down, just remember… You've won as many Oscars as Leonardo DiCaprio! Damn, you're good.
Dear random guy on his cellphone in public,
Please tell me what conversation you were having with the person on the other line. I'm sure it's an amusing story.
Sincerely, "Chicken can get cancer?? Wait wait wait, can chicken get cancer????"
Dear ramdom girl in my math class,
"Umm, he's my twin brother..."
Sincerely, "You two make such a cute couple!"