Dear boyfriend asking me to prove my love,
I shave my legs in the winter for you.
Sincerely, is that enough proof?
Please don't cover my eyes when watching a scene in a movie where there are girls dancing in bras and underwear.
Sincerely, I'm a girl; I see that in the mirror every morning.
Dear idiot who stole my bag of gummies,
I hope you like extra strength fiber supplements...
Sincerely, You won't in a few hours.
Dear Urban Outfitters Catalogue,
Who on earth goes hiking in the outdoors while wearing only a skirt, thick heels and a crop top?
Sincerely, Ohhh wait, you also have a beanie to protect you from harsh weather..never mind
Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
Sincerely, Just saying
Remember, math puns are the first sine of madness.
Where are you? I thought we had plans for tonight? I hope I didnt scare you off when I told you that I loved you...
Sincerely, Still awake at 5:30am
Oh my god you're late! What if I'm pregnant? What will my parents say? I'll have to drop out of college! I'll have to tell my boyfriend!! Oh wait....
Don't you ever feel like yelling "CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUS" when something goes wrong?
Sincerely, it makes the situation 10x better, I assure you
Dear people giving me judging stares,
Yes I am 14 with 1 year old twins, I support myself by whoring around on street corners and make all of my purchases at dollar stores and walmart
Sincerely, just kidding I'm babysitting
Dear Mum and Dad,
You are both white, I am at least part Asian. Please understand, I have known for a while. It's not that shocking.
Sincerely, just told I was adopted
Dear girl wearing a mini dress and 5 inch heels that just wiped out on the sidewalk,
It's Minnesota, in winter. There's ice
Sincerely, did you forget?
Dear Google Search,
I typed in, "Why can't I..." and you filled in, "...own a Canadian.".
Sincerely, just made my day.
Please continue being cute with your age
Sincerely, "what is that?!" me: lady gaga " you mean that thing is a person?!"