Dear Iceburg,
Please send my regards to global warming. Karma's a b****.
Sincerely, Titanic
Dear $800 sweater,
Are you made of unicorn hair?
Sincerely, anonymous.
Dear buyers,
Welcome! Our sizes are small, extra small, and anorexic. Our prices are high, higher, and OMG you're in debt!
Sincerely, Abercrombie and Fitch
Dear Drunk people,
Just because you CAN'T dance, doesn't mean you SHOULDN'T dance.
Sincerely, Alcohol
Dear guy in algebra that yelled "HOW DO YOU ADD LETTERS",
I'm pretty sure I love you
Sincerely, you said what all of us were thinking
Dear Michael Jackson,
I'm ok
Sincerely, Annie
Dear power outage,
Thank you for ending when I said lumos
Sincerely, my friends think I'm a wizard
Dear girl who said she could get ten times the number of guys I could,
Well... i have 0
Sincerely, 10 x 0 = 0
Dear cute girl,
On a scale of one to America, how free are you?
Sincerely, want to hang out?
Dear Person using the Big Bang Theory to study for Biology,
I am a theoretical physicist. Not a biologist.
Sincerely, Dr Sheldon Cooper
Dear Febreze,
So I took someone to a sketchy warehouse, blindfolded them, and then told them to take a deep breath.
Sincerely, writing from jail...
Dear dad,
Please stop telling me to bang 'em hard when I go to drumline rehearsal. It's.... awkward.
Sincerely, your 14 year old freshman snare drummer
Dear reader,
ಠ_ಠ
Sincerely, you should be studying right now
Dear world,
My aim is to keep the toilets clean, your aim helps
Sincerely, janitor.
Dear Men,
Please know that it's been proven that most women kill with poison.
Sincerely, still want that sandwich?


