Dear public school kids,
...and you think your sex ed is awkward
Sincerely, homeschooled with a pregnant mother
Dear pervy guys staring at me as I eat my Popsicle,
Sincerely, oh I even broke the Popsicle stick.
Please work out your legs, too
Sincerely, You Look Like Johnny Bravo
Please don't hide in the bathtub and jump out at me when I check for serial killers
Sincerely, just had a heart attack
Dear women and werewolves,
Please stop fighting over who has the worse 'time of the month'. I think we win.
Sincerely, female werewolves.
Dear my un-nerdy peers,
I told a chemistry joke once.
Sincerely, there was no reaction.
Licking my boyfriend's eyelids was not "sexy" and it did not "drive him wild". All it did was confuse him.
Sincerely, Loyal reader who now takes everything with a grain of salt.
Dear Mc Donald's ,
Thank you for not serving hot dogs, I don't think I could order a super-sized Mc wiener with a straight face.
Sincerely, a dirty mind
Dear 2 year old ,
Thank you for yelling IM RAINING while you are potty training
Sincerely, amused older sister
Dear person checking behind the curtain for serial killers,
DO YOU MIND?!?
Sincerely, serial killer trying to take a shower
Dear "those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it",
This saying just got a whole new meaning...
Sincerely, failing History class.
Dear fellow actors in my high school drama department,
Thank you so much for this award. It means a lot to me.
Sincerely, "Most Soulful Ginger"
Dear maple tree,
I'd tap that.
Please stop using the saying "Till the cows come home"
Sincerely, We live on a farm... They are home.