Why didn't you make me pancakes? You asked for a command, and I gave you one.
Sincerely, your disappointed owner
I'm sorry we haven't been seeing much of each other lately. The truth is . . . well, I've found someone else.
Sincerely, I've started seeing the Internet
We have a saying that goes, "If someone talks to you on the streets, he's either drunk, insane, or American."
I've got those lemons you wanted.
Dear People who say im to old to watch disney movies,
Bibbity Boppity piss off!
Sincerely, I'll watch what i want
Found you, bitch.
Sincerely, good at math
Dear teenagers who complain about the friend zone,
You know nothing of the friend zone!
Sincerely, S. Snape
Dear Calvin Klein clothing line,
Please I find it funny that you have have a brand of underwear, considering "Klein" means "small" in German.
Sincerely, an amused German speaker
I'm sorry but we just never have time for each other anymore.
Sincerely, leaving you for caffeine
Fun Fact: Women can reproduce using another woman's spinal fluid, creating only female babies. We could just eat you all and move on with our lives.
Sincerely, Let the feast begin.
Please stop to think you can do everything on your own and better than professionals. Especially cut your own hair.
Sincerely, wiser future Me.
While I appreciate the gesture to clean my room, your love of socks is now out of hand.
Sincerely, Where's the other one!?
Dear menstrual cycle monthly,
I would like to unsubscribe from you.
Today I was pompous and my sister was crazy. Today we were kidnappyed by hillfolk, never to be seen again. It was the best day ever!
Sincerely, "Simon Tam"
On the "Which Harry Potter Character are You" quiz I got Neville Longbottom and you got Draco Malfoy. On the "Game of Thrones" quiz I got Ned Stark and you got Joffrey. Should I be concerned?
Sincerely, apparently the friend of an evil blond kid