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Dear guys on tinder,
Pics of you with your arm around a girl does not exactly help your chances.
Dear guys who tell me they "like less makeup",
Please wear less makeup then.
Dear coworker,
You know what the best way to pass a drug test is? Don't do drugs.
Dear slow walkers in the hall,
Natural selection, natural selection...
Dear person who first ate an egg,
Who eats something that comes out of a chickens ass
Dear Americans,
We Know you aren't all fat, but I'm pretty sure you know all of us don't play hockey or say eh after every sentence.
Dear coworker,
You being a vegan is admirable. You snidely berating our customers for eating meat is not. You are the idiot who chose to get a job at Burger King.
Dear world,
Please try not to be offended when I giggle about the name..
Dear patient,
You may identify as male, but you are still biologically female, so no, I'm not being bigoted when I can't sign you up for a prostate exam. The system will literally not allow me to.
Dear bowser,
Please I give up you can have peach it's been 30 years I'm tired
Dear World,
Please stop calling us Grammar Nazis. We haven't killed millions of people; we just correct spoken and written language.
Dear toilet company's ,
Please make it so your toilets have a silent flush between the hours of 8pm and 8am
Dear Mother Nature,
Snow, rain, ice, slush, lightning, and thunder storm? Bitchy much?
Dear voice,
Getting lost on the day that I have a speech to present and am performing with my choir was not very considerate!
Dear Fanny Packs,
I'm sorry that society judges you on your appearance instead of the good that you do.
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