SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear science nerds,
A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender how much a drink costs. What does the bartender say?
Dear human body,
I really hate when I take a fresh shower, then have to take a crap as soon as I'm done showering. I just washed my butt, now I have to dirty it up again. Ugh!!!
Dear windshield wipers,
Can't touch this
Dear surround sound,
Please don't use a lion's roar as your test track.
Dear arm I slept on,
I CAN'T FEEL YOU. YOU'VE GONE NUMB. THIS IS THE DAY THEY'LL HAVE TO AMPUTATE.
Dear friend,
I haven't heard from you in a while.
Dear Girl who says nobody supports me,
Ahem
Dear humans,
You humans do realise you are omnivores [can survive on a herbivore diet] and I'M a carnivore, right? WHY ARE YOU JUDGING ME FOR THE THREE LITTLE PIGS?! Isn't one of the most overrated food obsession on the internet BACON? THE THING THAT COMES FROM PIGS? Hypocrital assholes. Of course, this doesn't count the humans who don't eat pigs. You continue hating me, I can understand that.
Dear toilet paper,
Please stop complaining that you have the worst job. I don't want to argue with you about this anymore.
Dear North Korea,
I meant put the take-out in the microwave when i said to nuke the Chinese.
I am so dumb,
When my doctor told me my tumor was "B9" I thought she was talking about the size of it...lol I now know she meant it wasn't cancerous.
Dear automatic flushing toilet,
I appreciate the enthusiasm, but........
Dear toys,
Was it awkward when Andy was getting dressed?
Dear Verizon store,
Why would you ever think it was a good idea to sell my grandfather an iPhone?
THIS IS PAGE 2
EVERYTHING WITHIN A MILLION PIXEL RADIUS OF HERE, COPYRIGHT © DEARBLANKPLEASEBLANK.COM - CONTACT US - TERMS AND PRIVACY - ABOUT US