Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear obnoxious French teacher,
Putting the clock in the back of the room just means your students will have severe neck pains.
Dear spider on the bathroom wall,
Is this awkward for you? ...because it's awkward for me.
Dear Hollywood,
There are tons of books I hate. Make movies about them?
Dear pet dog of mine,
No, I answer the door, not you. You want to know why? Because I have opposable thumbs.
Dear humans,
You realize, when we do learn to fly, you're all screwed, right?
Dear math teacher,
Now I lay me down to rest, a pile of math books on my desk, if I should die before I wake, that's one less test I have to take!
Dear boyfriend,
Really? WE'RE hard to buy for? You can get me perfume, chocolate, music, flowers, stuffed animals, jewelry, t-shirts, a gift card, movies, or books.
Dear girl making fun of my small boobs,
You're fat.
Dear college professors,
Why did I have to buy this text book if you aren't going to use it at all?
Dear Mr. Right ,
You and Waldo must be best friends...
Dear TV,
I'm sorry that I threw a shoe at you.
Dear Science teacher who's ringtone is Bill Nye the Science Guy,
I think I'm going to like this class.
Dear parents,
Procrastination is not a flaw, it is the delicate art of carefully considering what you have to do, and when you have to do it by.
Dear Mom,
Please tell me the next time you decide to come home from yoga through the back door.
Dear teachers,
You might want to consider checking your students homework instead of just putting checks on them...
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