Dear those who live in da hood.,
You think you live in a bad neightborhood? I live in the spaghetto!
Sincerely, an Italian American
Your love for me is truly touching, but foolish. We can never be.
Dear Bella Swan,
You are depressed and suicidal. Marry me?
Sincerely, Edward Cullen
Dear weather network,
You are all liars!
Sincerely, On vacation and not prepared!
Dear secretly gay people of the world,
Nobody should have to live in a closet. Come out!
Sincerely, Harry Potter
We come in peace. We just want to peacefully take over your planet. Don't panic.
Please solve your own problems.
Sincerely, not your therapist
You should be edible; you already have chips and cookies.
Sincerely, someone who would be even more obsessed...
If you want us to stay virgins, you should promote, not denounce, masturbation!
Sincerely, horny teenagers.
Dear "May the Force be...",
Equal to mass times acceleration.
Sincerely, there are several different types of nerds.
Do you wanna build a snowman or would you rather build one without me and abandon me like the terrible sister that you are?
You better cry over spilled milk!
Sincerely, milk cows with sore udders
Dear George R. R. Martin,
You're killing me!
Sincerely, and everyone in your books, of course...