Dear "aren't you a little old to be a Girl Scout?",
Yes. yes I am.
Sincerely, Now would you like a box of thin mints or not?
Dear incredibly rude chick,
Did you SERIOUSLY just repeatedly try to look up my husband's kilt right in front of me? Please learn about manners and boundaries!
Sincerely, Before I have to teach you the hard way
Sincerely, teenagers everywhere
Dear Miley Cyrus,
Please put on pants. Its okay. I promise.
Dear Steak marinated in red wine sauce next to the grill...,
My hipster girlfriend thinks I'm a vegetarian, but you know our little secret don't you? ahahahaahahaha
Sincerely, Hungry Carnivore
Dear French Boy who winked at me,
Please go away or i will find you and marry you
Sincerely, that girl who looked at you like she was choking
Here, have a blanket. It's for shock.
Thank you so much for brightening my day when we tried to figure out what you stand for!
Sincerely, National Agency of Space Adventures
Dear Overprotective brother,
Why couldn't I be the one to beat up the jackass who asked me out for the 6th time?
Sincerely, You have all the fun
I asked a twelve-year-old why we called it "rewinding" a video today. She didn't know.
Please stop acting like an overly attached girlfriend. I don't want you all over me. Don't make me get a restrsining order.
Seriously what did I do to piss you off
Sincerely, still can't get a girlfriend
Stop trying to make Google Plus happen. It's NOT going to happen
Sincerely, The World
Dear serial killer who may or may not be behind my shower curtain,
I have a black belt, I keep a metal baseball bat in my shower, and I fight dirty. Still wanna try to kill me?
Sincerely, a prepared Psycho fan