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Dear math textbooks,
Please continue to attempt to seem racially diverse.
Dear Christian school,
You're saying tank tops aren't allowed because they're a distraction to boys?
Dear guy shopping with your girlfriend,
I saw that look you gave my girlfriend when she started talking about her bedazzled nerf gun.
Dear long blonde hair on my shower wall,
I'm a brunette with a pixie cut and I live alone...
Dear freshmen boys trying to grow a moustache,
Sorry, but um... You have a little bit of dirt... Yeah right there.
Dear God,
Please send some clothes to the poor ladies on my dad's computer.
Dear Birds,
I still don't understand our relationship.
Dear mathematicians,
I know you've been looking for X for years, in fact X is equal to 10.
Dear purple crayon,
Why must you look EXACTLY like the blue crayon?
Dear Snookie,
So you're bright orange and love lasanga? Real orignal.
Dear Jocks,
Being a single guy who likes musical theater doesn't make me gay.
Dear Grandma,
Why thank you, I am very ingenious and am going to rule the technological world because I knew how to fix your computer.
Dear History Teacher,
Kind of ironic I failed my presentation by not being loud enough.
Dear people who don't like Harry Potter because there's magic in it,
Have you ever seen Cinderella?
Dear Dad,
Please stop threatening to leave me at home if I'm not ready for school on time. That isn't a real punishment.
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