For the love of all that's holy - stop putting sirens in your music!
Sincerely, just slammed on my brakes looking for the cop.
I was just taking a power nap.
Sincerely, what did you think I was doing?
Dear serial killer,
Sincerely, killed while I was checking behind the shower curtain.
Dear Bruno Mars,
Wouldn't YOUR eyes have to be open to know that hers were?