They may do you, but they only think about me.
Please return my boyfriend to me
Sincerely, the girlfriend
Dear Best Friends,
Thanks for being just crazy enough that I seem normal in comparison
Sincerely, your different and probably more crazy friend
Dear Trans coworker,
I don't care what your prefered pronouns are, I'm going to call you dude, bro or gurl because thats how I refer to everyone.
Sincerely, I'm bad at names.
Dear mild milk allergy,
Thank you for still letting me tolerate small amount of ice cream.
Sincerely, it's very considerate of you
Dear Girls searching for Prince Charming,
Please remember the movie Shrek, if you do then you remember Prince Charming was a spoiled mommas boy who was a cry baby and was a total dick
Sincerely, why not find a hard working man who can take care of you?
Please know that it really hurts when you belittle me all the time. I worked hard for that 92%, don't ask me why it wasn't a 100%.
Sincerely, It's still an A
Dear waxing strips ads,
Waxing smoothy smoothy legs that have zero hair on them is not realistic. Wax a gorilla, then I'll be impressed.
Sincerely, hairy legs everywhere
Dear mountain bikers riding down the mountain as I am running up,
Thank you so much for your nods of encouragement and for telling me "good job!" You have no idea how much it helps me when I'm fighting my way painfully uphill with burning legs and lungs.
Sincerely, a now re-motivated runner.
Dear 22 year old guy friend,
You're a whovian, browncoat, Trekkie, DM of our d&d game, and a ton of other perfectly nerdy things, not to mention your great taste in music...now if only this age difference wasn't a problem.
Sincerely, your 16 year old female friend who is head over heels for you
You can punch each other in the face, or punch a whole through a wall, but talking about your feelings makes you uncomfortable? You can say the word penis but the word period makes you uncomfortable.
Sincerely, why do we let you run the country
Sometimes I do hate having to hear people call me flat chested but at night I love you so much.
Sincerely, I enjoy sleeping on my stomach.
Dear people at the airport.,
The flight attendant called parents with small children and people in wheelchairs up to board. You should not be getting in line yet.
Sincerely, it just makes boarding take longer.
No we do not ride camels to school, live in the desert, or wear ancient costume. We're just like you.
My mom has to get around without bending, and my dad can only bend without the ability to get around since his leg mysteriously hurts like hell. They don't deserve so much pain, not with how much they've done and want to do for others.
Sincerely, their daughter who does not appreciate this kind of irony