Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
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Dear people staring,
I am 15. The kid I am with is 8. Of course she's not my daughter. She's my sister. I was not pregnant at 7.
Dear Bruno Mars,
How can you throw your hand in your pants, chill in your snuggie, and strut in your birthday suit all at the same time?
Dear boy dancing with me,
Roses are red, violets are blue, if you grab my butt, I'll punch you.
Dear unborn child,
I can promise you that no matter how hard you kick, you're not getting out for a while.
Dear Kermit,
You're right, it isn't easy being green.
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