Dear Pot Dealers,
Thank You for supporting home cooked meals. Also, I broke my last pot.
Sincerely, Wait? You're selling drugs?
Dear people that write "bestfriend",
Hello. My name is Señor Spacebar. You killed proper syntax.
Sincerely, Prepare to die!
Dear men of the world,
Here's some man-to-man-advice: Don't ever underestimate the power of femininity.
Sincerely, a guy who said something stupid and got his eyebrows plucked by force
Dear Geometry Student,
Please try this problem again. I'm pretty sure none of my sides measure -39 units.
Sincerely, The Parallelogram
Your mom has got it goin' on.
When did "suck" and "blow" start meaning the same thing?
Sincerely, your vacuum cleaner
Please stop being such an attention who*e and let me have my time to shine
Dear Star Wars fans,
A suggestion: Next time you got to an airport, cover your luggage so that it shows a picture of R2-D2 and C-3PO. Then when TSA asks to take your luggage, you know what to say.
Sincerely, "These are not the droids you're looking for"
Please give me my life back.
Dear girl who thinks she knows all about Harry Potter,
His name is Ron not Don.
Sincerely, pissed off potter-head
Dear roommate having sex in our room while I'm trying to sleep,
have you no shame?
Sincerely, disrespected roommate
In the next 100 years, the word 'politician' will become one of the most offensive insults ever.
Sincerely, A Random Person
If I had to choose between eating pizza and cuddling with you, I would choose cuddling with you.
Sincerely, this must be what love feels like!
Dear Peanut Butter,
I was going to say yes to your proposal, but I've been hearing some rumors about you and Jam...