Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
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Dear people who call me gay for being in a play,
Your girlfriends panties and bra match...
Dear gay community,
Please warn us that you are gay BEFORE we fall in love with you. Being smart, funny, nice, attractive, and a Thespian means that we are bound to love you.
Dear "you look so much like your sister",
That's funny....
Dear teacher,
Yes I WOULD like to go up there and teach the subject.
Dear men,
Girls (Gurls) - n. A highly sensitive animal that when scared will attempt to yell and scream to defend itself. It always seems to travel in a pack, and has mood swings approximately every 17 seconds.
Dear guy who asked "so what did you have for dinner last night? Rice?",
Just because I'm Asian doesn't mean I eat rice every day...
Dear bladder,
Please stop bursting 3 seconds before I get to the bathroom.
Dear guy I randomly flirted with on the street,
Since when are you in my geography class?!
Dear guys with hairy chests,
Go ahead and take v-necks out of your wardrobe.
Dear cell phone inventors,
Please add a sarcastic button.
Dear Mexican women painting my toenails,
I speak fluent Spanish and understand every word you're saying.
Dear good hair day,
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Dear Febreeze commercials,
If someone blindfolds me, tells me to relax, and take a few deep breaths, I'm going to think I'm being prepared for rape, not about to smell lavender scented pillows
Dear Child complaining about long road trips,
Shut up! You have a DVD player and a portable game systems to keep you entertained!
Dear guy staring at me as I am taking a tampon out of my purse,
Oh do you need one?
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