Dear kids who always know the gossip,
Well...I saw my teacher and my principal kissing...
Dear fans of The Great Gatsby,
What did Jay Gatsby say when his car ran over Myrtle Wilson?
Sincerely, Oopsy Daisy
If you liked it then you should've put a ring on it.
Please remember that no matter what you look like, there's going to be someone out there that'll find you attractive.
Sincerely, people are into some pretty weird things
You are not a thong. You need to accept that fact.
Sincerely, my butt hurts.
Dear Every Fish in the Sea,
Keep calm and... Nope, lost it.
I met my parents before I was born.
Sincerely, Marty McFly
I'll take those lemons now!
Sincerely, broke college student
Dear fellow band geeks,
Please stop making out on the bus to the competition.
Sincerely, when the band director said "Do lip exercises.", I don't believe this is what he meant.
I've told you this before and I'll tell you again: I do not suffer from multiple personalities!
Sincerely, and hey, neither do I!
Dear very conservative Aunt and Uncle,
I heard you told my mom not to let her daughter marry a black man. Have you ever heard "be careful what you wish for?"
Sincerely, interested in women
Y'know, I used to be okay with you. I didn't even mind when you and the alphabet started hooking up. But now a three-way triangle with Latin? Seriously?
Sincerely, no, you do not need a sine!
The reason girls go to the bathroom in packs is either to talk about you or escape out the window together.
Sincerely, just in case you wanted to know
I am sure I will find the humor in this prank after I change my pants. Thanks for scaring me to death at 2 a.m.
Sincerely, NOT BLINKING! Call the Doctor and Clara.