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Dear optimist pessimist and realist,
While you guys were arguing about the piece of cake, I ate it.
MTV,
Why did the "M" in your name change from "Music" to "Maternity"?
Dear God,
Please give us back Tupac and we'll give you Justin Bieber
Dear Victoria's Secret,
"Canadian residents must correctly answer a mathematical skill-testing question to redeem prize," is a part of your contest rules.
Dear friends new boyfriend,
Please be respectful to her. I know how you can be with people, and I swear to God, if you hurt her, I will never forgive you.
Dear Justin Bieber,
Please shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Dear Harper Lee,
Oh, you wrote TWO books now? Call me when you've written over 50.
Dear okay-looking guy in my college class,
Please stop answering biology questions so confidently in a room filled with mostly idiots.
Dear naptime,
I know that when I was younger I used to fight you but I'm older and more mature now and I was wondering I you would be willing to reconcile with me...I'm sorry and I would do anything to have you back
Dear Mom,
Just that you don't see me studying does not mean that I'm not studying at all
Dear professors telling me to always speak up to my superiors because "the squeaky wheel gets the oil",
Or it gets thrown out and replaced by a non-squeaky wheel.
Dear politicians,
When you make laws banning gay marriage, abortion, or other controversial topics, you are forcing your beliefs onto others. If you allow it, you let people decide based on their beliefs. However, if you ban it, you don't let anyone decide, including those who agree with it.
Dear fellow atheists,,
Please stop being assholes. Seriously. You bitch and moan about being "oppressed" if religious people make even slight references to their faith, yet you think it's okay for you to blatantly disrespect and insult others' beliefs?
Dear Women,
You know why there are no more "nice guys"? Because when we were nice to you, you treated us like shit and went after the asshole. So guess what, we became assholes so that you would pay attention to us.
Dear Everyone in High School,
The "popular" girls aren't always the mean ones.
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