Dear customers talking on their phones when they pull into the drive-thru,
We can hear you.
Sincerely, waiting to take your order because I'm dying to know more about this Paul character.
Dear Internet users,
Buffering, yeah that was me.
Dear Who You Gonna Call?,
Dear Justin Beiber,
When you were thirteen you had your first love? Please i was already planning world domination!
Dear people who say "Bae",
You do realize that Bae means poop, right?
Sincerely, fluent in Danish
Roses are red, here's something new: violets are violet, not fucking blue.
I thought the M stood for music, not maternity...
Sincerely, you had me fooled
Dear "All Asians look the same",
So I look like Jessica Jung?
We know that you only brush your teeth right before you come here. It doesnt work
Sincerely, dentists and orthodontists
You probably aren't even IN the friendzone, probably more like the "God-Not-Him-Again" Zone....
Sincerely, Trust me, I don't want to be your friend either
Dear person who is confused on how to fit the sleeping bag into the bag,
Sincerely, sleeping bag making company…
I'm tired of trying to find where you're hiding.
Sincerely, this would be easier if I could actually SEE.
Please understand that employing rats to make clothing is frowned upon in all kingdoms.
Sincerely, no one wants rabies in their clothing
Unless you learn some tricks from the books I read, I refuse to spend more time with you.
Sincerely, or we could compromise at sound effects and background music.