Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
Sincerely, Just saying
Dear Football team,
Yes, yes I am blaring the Tangled soudtrack from my car right next to where your practice is taking place. No I will not stop.
Sincerely, if it's so stupid, then why is numer 29 singing along?
Dear Google Search,
I typed in, "Why can't I..." and you filled in, "...own a Canadian.".
Sincerely, just made my day.
Please send some clothes to the poor ladies on my dad's computer.
Sincerely, 6-year-old daughter.
Dear online website that asked if I was human,
What do you think I am?
Sincerely, a tiger with thumbs
Dear blondes that get mad at dumb blonde jokes,
People joke that Latinos steal cars, Australians ride kangaroos, Indians work at 7-11, Muslims are terrorists, Chinese people can't drive, Black people are gangsters, and White guys can't dance. Get over it.
Sincerely, Ginger with no soul
Dear Sex Ed Teacher,
You just made Sex Ed my favorite course.
Sincerely, just stuck your whole arm in a condom to show that no guy can lie that the condom 'doesn't fit.'
Dear illegal Mexican immigrants,
Thank you for distracting the Americans from the other border...
Sincerely, illegal Canadian immigrant
Dear Lady at the park,
When you asked me if the baby was my sister, and I said no the look on your face was priceless!
Sincerely, 11 year old baby-sitting her cousin
Thank you for making my breath visible.
Sincerely, I LOOK LIKE A DRAGON!
Dear Spongebob creators,
A squirrel in a space suit, a snail that meows, and a crab with a whale as a daughter
Sincerely, you guys were high
Dear Mr. Weasely,
The exact function of a rubber duck is a bath time companion or toy.
Dear Optimist Pessimist and Realist,
While you guys were busy arguing about the glass of water, I drank it!
Sincerely, the Opportunist
What did sodium say when chloride attacked it?