Dear Internet users,
Buffering, yeah that was me.
Dear customers talking on their phones when they pull into the drive-thru,
We can hear you.
Sincerely, waiting to take your order because I'm dying to know more about this Paul character.
Dear Who You Gonna Call?,
Have you considered getting glasses?
Sincerely, the thing you're looking for is right in front of you.
Dear Justin Beiber,
When you were thirteen you had your first love? Please i was already planning world domination!
Dear people who make Hufflepuff jokes,
Please know that we don't FIND your jokes very funny.
Sincerely, a Hufflepuff
How many tickles did it take for the octopus to laugh?
Dear people who say "Bae",
You do realize that Bae means poop, right?
Sincerely, fluent in Danish
I thought the M stood for music, not maternity...
Sincerely, you had me fooled
Roses are red, here's something new: violets are violet, not fucking blue.
When you answer the phone while exercising, it sounds much more inappropriate than you think.
Sincerely, Nearly-traumatized employee
Dear "All Asians look the same",
So I look like Jessica Jung?
I wish you weighed a less so that our lion king renditions looked a little more dramatic.
Sincerely, this wasn't supposed to be a comedy.
We know that you only brush your teeth right before you come here. It doesnt work
Sincerely, dentists and orthodontists