Dear Edward and Peter,
Please stop fighting. You are both terrible dates. We've decided to become lesbians.
Sincerely, Wendy and Bella
If god isn't real then how did zip zop zoopity bop razzle dazzle jello pudding?
Sincerely, Bill Cosby
I can look down at my crotch and smile anytime I want!
Please don't barge into my room unannounced when I am finally figuring out how pleasant "alone" time can be
Sincerely, Newly Frustrated
Dear "Bad Test Takers",
Please stop saying you're bad test takers. You're just stupid. You struggle with that part where we find out what you know?
Sincerely, Daniel Tosh
Dear Department of Motor Vehicles,
Please be less annoying.
Please change your mind and ask me out again...
Sincerely, so I can reject you for being so horrible to me.
You might have blue, but do you have purple? Thats what we thought...
Dear women of the world,
It's my period, and it hurts. Pity please. Seriously, who annoyed Mother Nature so much she'd screw her own gender over so badly?
Sincerely, in killer pain
Dear Guy in my building,
Please don't glare at me when I open the building "only" two minutes early. Next time, don't be wearing shorts in a snow storm maybe?
Sincerely, disgruntled building worker in Wisconsin
Dear people who try to win in an argument online,,
Remember to use "your" and "you're" correctly.
Sincerely, it just ruins your whole argument.
Stop complaining about how long it takes you to grade stuff.
Sincerely, you assigned it!
The boy I have to kiss in drama class does NOT need to be the boy for whom I fall into a deep, dank, and uncontrollable love for.
Sincerely, the Girl With Too Many Feelings
Dear woman driving the car next to me,
Please stop painting your nails while driving. You almost hit me.
Sincerely, the woman in the car next to you.