Dear roommate,
Who the hell stays up till 2 am studying math on a Friday night then wakes up at 7 am on a Saturday?
Dear Anonymous,
Mary had a little lamb, she tied it to a pylon. 10,000 volts went up it's arse and turned it's wool to nylon.
Dear transgendered female patient:,
Please stop swearing at me and threatening to report me to the Board of Medicine. You don't have a vagina or uterus, so I can't actually do a pelvic exam. And I'm an OB-Gyn: I don't do prostate exams. I also can't prescribe you birth control - because it wouldn't work
Dear Netflix ,
Please add more disney movies.
Dear everyone,
When did the definition of "troll" become "anyone who disagrees with my views, even if he/she is doing so in a non-inflammatory manner"? Why are some of you so quick to want dissenting opinions silenced, censored, and/or disregarded? When did seeing all sides of an issue become a bad thing?
Dear Dad,
I do not forgive you for throwing things at me when your drunk. I do not forgive you for making me watch my back when your drunk because im scared you might hit me. Im sorry i cant explain to you right now why im not going to your house. Im sorry i dont think you deserve that kind of respect...
Dear People who only preach about "equality" for a certain group,
If the LGBT community can have Gay,Lesbian,Bi, or Trans parades, then I want to be able to have a Straight parade or no sexual orientation gets to have one. If the Black community gets a whole month dedicated to their history then there should also be a White, Hispanic, and also Asian History Months or no race gets one. If women want to be treated as equals to men then they also need to take on the responsibilities and consequences it comes with and not get favored in places like courts.
Dear coworker,
You consistently show up 10 minutes late for your shifts, so of course you are going to get the crap jobs. You want to choose the best jobs, you need to get here early.
Dear family,
Please stop asking me what I want to go into and give me a disgusted look when I tell you I have no idea
Dear Mum,
Please stop having a go about the state of my bedroom. Your office is a mess of paper. The chair in your room is covered in your clothes. If you shoved the two rooms together they'd look like mine.
Dear friends,
Please stop joking about my boyfriend's and my sex life it's funny for 5 seconds but that's it.
Dear "why doesn't Disney have interracial couples?" ,
Pocahontas and John Smith?
Dear amazing boyfriend,
Thank you for bringing me a chocolate frog. It means so much to me but I can't decide if I want to eat it or save it to hopefully show our kids some day
Dear neighbor,
Please , feel free to call the police to report me "attacking" your dog. I have a picture, on my phone, of your mutt biting my ankle and of the bite marks that got through my pants. I'd love to see that little rat get put down.
Dear people who use the "free speech" defence,
Free speech allows you to escape punishment for criticising the government. It does not give you free reign to say whatever you like. While you can say whatever you like, you will receive consequences. Try telling your boss to "go fuck himself" and watch as you get fired. Go threaten to kill a police officer and watch as you get arrested. Go spread bigotry and watch as everybody mocks you.