Dear Honors and AP Teachers,
Please understand that students DO have a life outside of school
Sincerely, Student with five hours of homework
Dear "Driving around town with the girl I love",
I see you and I'm like... You know what I'm like.
Dear homework ,
Thanks to you I have cleaned my room done my laundry and walked my dog and did the dishes
Dear those uninformed,
Please understand that the Bible is figurative. The "seven days" was billions of years, dinosaurs existed, and the Bible corresponds/agrees with Evolution.
Sincerely, a Christian scientist
Dear People who want Cheap Accessable flying cars,
It is hard enough for you to drive on two dimensions. Imagine how how many accidents there would be in three. Plus, think of where the cars would land when they crash.
Sincerely, There will be no Auto-fitting clothes either.
Dear math teacher,
I will NEVER use proofs after high school.
Sincerely, I'm not going to be a mathematician.
Dear Father Who Stiffed Me Last Night,
I watched your kids 3 from 5pm to 3am last night so you could go to that wedding. We discussed my rate per hour. You really though you could bully me into not charging you? And you thought when I wouldn't leave without my pay it would be a good idea to slap me in the hotel lobby?
Sincerely, Watching The Concierge Beat You Up Was Payment Enough For Me
There is a special place in hell for those of you who choose to drive with your high beams on during the DAY.
Please make iPhone chargers a few feet longer.
Sincerely, iPhone owners everywhere.
Dear laundry detergent commercials,
It would be nice to know if your product can wash out blood stains.
Sincerely, a girl with annoyingly irregular periods.
You have nothing on me, cos' tonight, I am going to sleep at 11.30 p.m.
Sincerely, world-class lingerer
Dear "Alone with cake batter",
Can I join you?
Sincerely, Shy single gentleman
Dear Westboro Baptist,
There are homosexual Christians in the world. If God, AKA 'our controller', really had anything against what they do, he probably would have done something about it by now.
Sincerely, a heterosexual semi-Christian
Please stop locking yourselves out of your rooms. Your adults bring your key with you!
Sincerely, Your RA
Dear nicest boy I know,
You're right. You do deserve to get the girl. Unfortunately, appearances do matter and she can't get over your smell, size, and acne.
Sincerely, the girl you're after, who doesn't deserve you anyway.