I've told you this before and I'll tell you again: I do not suffer from multiple personalities!
Sincerely, and hey, neither do I!
Dear fellow engineering majors,
I know females are rare, but please stop staring at me.
Sincerely, there are plenty of girls in the library go stare at them
Dear girls who say they love accents,
No you don't.
Sincerely, you just like hot guys with accents, not the accent itself
Dear mom and dad,
Please realize we have a heater in our house.
Sincerely, your daughter who's in four layers and has six blankets
The next one of you to be rude to me is getting vomited on.
Sincerely, your cashier who is forced to come in, even though she is sick
I hate to break this to you, but talking to your kid with a British accent will not give them one too. As a child develops their linguistic abilities, they will first learn from the parents but will eventually have an accent matching their peers (who will be presumably American). Therefore, you'll need to move to Great Britain.
Dear favorite fictional characters,
Please stop being more kind, intelligent, and interesting than the people I know in real life. I need to form real relationships, and it's hard when you're all so much better.
Sincerely, a bookworm
Dear Mascara and Eyeliner,
I have used at least four makeup remover pads and you are still plastered to my face. If I was crying you would have been off hours ago.
Sincerely, frustrated teenage girl
I know you want me to keep throwing the tennis ball, but you have to give it back first!
Thank you for providing a temporary solution to my insomnia.
Sincerely, now if only you didn't cause it....
Dear people who say "Life is short" ,
Life isn't short, life is the longest thing anyone does.
When I search for definitions I did not mean give me a bunch of beyond college-level texts to work with.
Dear English Ph.D,
I'll have cream with that.
Sincerely, the Med Student
Please create a Muslim princess that breaks all stereotypes that are placed upon us.
Sincerely, A Muslim Girl Trying to Make Change in the World
I don't mind the ads. I really don't. But do you have to play the same ones over and over and over and over and over?
Sincerely, I now hate that ad so much I will never get the product even if I did want it.