Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
Dear people who like chemistry jokes,
Are you made out of copper and tellurium?
Dear Dentist,
Do YOU brush after EVERY meal?
Dear parents,
A minute I enjoy wasting is not a wasted minute.
Dear teacher,
You shouldn't be mad at me. You asked me "would you like to teach the class?" I answered yes. The consequences are entirely you're fault.
Dear girl who says she wants a guy like me,
I'M A GUY LIKE ME.
Dear humans,
You realize, when we do learn to fly, you're all screwed, right?
Dear awesome aunt,
Thank you for the "What happens on campus, stays on campus" shirt. Dad laughed, Mom looks vaguely uncomfortable, and my friends think it's hilarious.
Dear Monsters Inc,
Well this is awkward.
Dear Mother in law,
Please stop refering to my pregnancy as "we're pregnant" I remember the night I got pregnant and trust me you weren't there..
Dear boys,
You say you want a girl who plays video games, gets internet humor, and cooks reasonably well. Well, what are you waiting for?
Dear memory,
How come I can remember dozens of song lyrics but I can't remember test answers?
Dear boys,
If i can't talk to you about my tampons, please don't talk to me about your porn.
Dear Science teacher who's ringtone is Bill Nye the Science Guy,
I think I'm going to like this class.
Dear Teacher who asked "If I arranged 30 boxes of a pencils into triangles what would I have?",
Some sort of mental illness?
Dear movie makers,
You do realize that the reason the book was turned into a movie because people loved the BOOK, right?
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