Dear classmates,
Please stop personally attacking our teacher because you make bad grades. She's an amazing educator, and I've watched you fall asleep in the back row more times than I care to count.
Dear wanting to ban the r word makes you an idiot,
Please realize that medical retardation is NO LONGER politically correct
Dear teachers,
Please stop saying you shouldn't work harder than us, You get PAID!!
Dear Best Friend,
I'm in love with you. I've never met a person who gets me and cherishes me as much as you do.
Dear Star Wars fans,
A suggestion: Next time you got to an airport, cover your luggage so that it shows a picture of R2-D2 and C-3PO. Then when TSA asks to take your luggage, you know what to say.
Dear beautiful heterochromatic French girl I met,
Please stop wearing contacts because of him. Your fiance doesn't appreciate your individuality, and you admit he never gives you any attention. You should stand up for yourself and be with someone who loves you.
Dear Freshman Biology Teacher,
Thank you for helping me. I got an A+ for the first time ever in your class. Now I've got the top grade in every single one of my classes. I even got a 103 in math
Dear boyfriend,
Thank you so much for having a garbage can in your bathroom. It spares me a lot of embarrassment.
Dear judgmental classmates,
Please You are right; my car IS new and shiny. However, I am not spoiled by my parents. When my grandmother passed away, she left a decent portion of money to my mother, who used it to buy me the car I desperetly needed.
Dear People who want to ban the "R" word,
Please realize that mental retardation is a true medical term and the retard is just the abbreviation for the medical term. Only the idiots who use the words wrong are the ones who cause you to dislike the word.
Dear boy,
If I had to choose between eating pizza and cuddling with you, I would choose cuddling with you.
Dear "latin is useless",
I learned more about grammar in Latin than in my English grammar class!
Dear professors threatening to strike,
Please don't strike. I pay so much for this school that you have no right to be threatening to screw with my education. Go find another job if you don't like your pay, don't throw off thousands of students graduation track.
Dear woman having me carry out your government subsidized lobster and cigarettes to your new Cadillac while you talk on your iPhone,
Please spend the $25 involuntarily taken out of my $200 check every week more responsibly,
Dear famous children's authors,
I want my books to be like yours. I don't want the fame, the money.I want to be able to do what you have done.