Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
Dear teacher,
Please realize that when you tell us to put our heads down, it is not a punishment.
Dear cute guy on facebook,
If you could see who watched your profile and how often, you'd probably request protective custody...
Dear little kid drawing mustaches on Justin Bieber pictures,
I'd give you props, but mustaches come with puberty...
Dear Dad,
You know something's wrong when I'm the one telling you to stop constantly texting and to enjoy the moment.
Dear english teacher,
Why, yes, I CAN go to the bathroom.
Dear religion,
There never will be an "us."
Dear school,
I see you removed all the games from the computer but left Paint...
Dear guys,
Believe me, call us beautiful and we'll treat you like a king.
Dear best friend's new boyfriend,
Just FYI, I keep duct tape, a shovel, rope and gloves in my car, and I watch plenty of NCIS to know how to make it look like an accident.
Dear older folks,
If you want us young adults to respect you, you need to respect us as well.
Dear women everywhere,
Good men are hard to find.
Dear house,
How come you only make strange, unrecognizable noises when I'm home alone?
Dear food labels,
Serving size is 1/4 of cookie? Who the hell eats only 1/4 of a cookie?
Dear boys who say they like girls without makeup,
I think you mean you like naturally beautiful girls without makeup.
Dear parents,
Texting + Facebook= Textbook... so yes, I am studying.
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