I see dead people.
If all gay people go to hell, it's got to be FABULOUS!
Sincerely, it is going to A-māzing...
Dear lady wearing shorts and a bikini top,
This is Target, not Walmart.
Sincerely, please put some clothes on!
She only shaves for ME!
Sincerely, gym class.
Downstream? That is way too mainstream for us.
Dear blonde on Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader,
Thank goodness you're pretty!
Sincerely, hummingbirds have two wings, not four...
Dear underage partiers,
Do you really think that when you post a picture of you at a party holding a beer can and blur out just the beer can that that suddenly makes a difference? Do you think we are all going "oh theres a little blurred out spot on the picture that just happens to be placed over everyones hand in every picture, well that couldn't possibly be a beer can. Nah, it was probably soda and they just didn't want people to know what kind."
Sincerely, laughing at your pathetic attempts.
Dear AP calculus,
It was easier understanding Inception...
Dear overly enthusiastic friend,
Please excuse me for swearing like a truck driver when you slapped me on the back to say hello.
Sincerely, severely sunburned and in pain!
Dear Facebook's "people you may know",
No mutual friends, lives in a different country, and not to mention they look like a pedophile...
Dear Dancing with the Stars,
Your name is really misleading...
Sincerely, expecting a science documentary about our milky way.
Dear vending machines,
Sorry... I must have forgotten my clothes-iron at home. My bad!
Sincerely, just take the bill!
Thank you for never checking the internet history.
Sincerely, your son.
Dear Justin Bieber,
Oh you've designed your own perfume, and nail polish line?
Sincerely, do you really expect us to believe your straight?