Dear "An apple a day keeps the doctor away",
Sincerely, Steve Jobs
Dear Jersey Shore,
If I wanted to watch talking carrots I would've watched Veggie Tales.
Dear mean girls,
It's not that I hate you....I just hope you start your next period in a shark tank.
Please stop sending me funny texts at the completely wrong moment
Sincerely, laughing at a funeral...
Dear yoga teacher,
I do know how to do downward facing dog. I do it wrong to stare at the hot guy behind me
Sincerely, there's no attractive guys between my hands...
Dear Science Major Roomate,
No, the Nucleus dissolves into Chromosomes during Prophase. I sometimes read your textbook when I get bored.
Sincerely, Music Major
Dear Mystery Seeker,
"Go to Wal-Mart, buy one banana, two jars of chocolate sauce, and one roll of duct tape. Be sure to look suspicious."
Sincerely, Challenge Accepted
Dear creators of the tampon,
Did you try to make it look like sperm on purpose?
Sincerely, creeped out girl
Dear erotic novels,
what part is considered the climax of the story?
Sincerely, a VERY curious english student
Dear Kay Jewelers,
Every kiss does NOT begin with K.
Sincerely, peck, snog, make-out, smooch, and French
Dear ex boyfriend who gave my number out to people for "free sex",
That's alright, I have your iTunes password ;)
Sincerely, just spent $600 on music :)
Dear my poor innocent puppy,
Sorry about my dad lifting you up in the air and singing the circle of life
Sincerely, also annoyed daughter
Dear men who are baffled by bras,
I can unlatch mine from the back and completely take it off... while keeping my shirt on.
Sincerely, you jelly?
Dear Chicken and the Egg,
Does it really matter who came first? Because I win anyway.
Sincerely, The frying pan.