Dear Mr. President,
Roses are red, violets are blue, Osama is dead, can I now bring my shampoo?
Sincerely, I need my hair products when I travel!
Dear National Geographic article about hippos eating people,
I THOUGHT THEY ONLY ATE WHITE MARBLES!!!!
Sincerely, terrified reader.
Please clear your internet history...
Sincerely, mentally scarred teenage daughter.
No, I don't speak Canadian.
Sincerely, do you speak American?
Dear jerk ex-boyfriend,
Please continue to tell me repeatedly that I'm never going to find anyone else like you.
Sincerely, that's kinda what I was hoping for when I dumped you!
OM NOM NOM.
Sincerely, student loans.
Dear people trying to make a point,
Sincerely, I just made three. What now?
Just because I'm a redhead doesn't mean this is like The Little Mermaid. There is no talking crab who's going to tell you when it's okay to kiss me.
Sincerely, DO IT ALREADY!
"If you don't have an iphone, you don't have an iphone".
Sincerely, oh really now?
Dear people of the world,
I will always be ahead of you, and in the future.
Sincerely, a girl in New Zealand.
Watch out for that tree!
Sincerely, George of the Jungle.
You only had one life left? Oh, my bad...
Just because I eat my burritos sideways doesn't mean you have to stare at me like I have two heads.
Sincerely, it's fun to pretend to be a zombie.
Dear girls who's prom dresses look like two pieces of cloth held together by a beaded string,
Are you dyslexic??
Sincerely, it's "Prom" not "Porn".