Dear rest of the world,
Just to tell you no one in Australia says "put a shrimp on the barbie" For one we call them prawns!
Sincerely, ALL Australians
Dear everyone who says their vote doesn't count,
In Baltimore's County Executive primary, a candidate won by only 20 votes. If 21 people would have voted for the other candidate, he would have lost. Think about that.
I have an idea. How about promoting what you love instead of bashing what you hate?
Dear US and MD politicians who want to bring illegal immigrants in,
There's so much gang violence and crime in inner city Baltimore that our kids can't even play outside. We can’t take out the trash without locking the door. You're spending billions on illegals, but what about our neighborhoods? Where can we get asylum? Where can we get refugee status?
Sincerely, frustrated Baltimore residents
Dear makers of "Quest for Camelot",
How does the stone heal King Arthur's arm and separate conjoined dragons, but fail to restore Garrett's sight?
Sincerely, I'm all for handicapped heroes, but that's a gaping plothole
"Feminists" want women to have equal rights to men. Equal. It's "misandrists" who are crazy men-haters and want female supremacy.
Sincerely, they're not the same thing. Learn the difference.
I fell in love with you. You showed no interest. Now you say you're interested in me. I've pretty much moved on.
Sincerely, Get your shit together
Dear Jade (my cat),
Thank you for coming over and licking my face to make sure I was okay when I fell down the stairs.
Sincerely, My parents just laughed at me.
Dear guy with tattoos,
no I don't want to see your "sick" ink "brah",
Sincerely, the other guy with tattoos who wants to drink his coffee
I don't understand why you think that I'll be safer if I give you my phone number to put on display.
Sincerely, I'll take my "medium" level security, thank you very much.
Dear douche bag sitting in front of me,
Thanks for that asthma attack you gave me
Sincerely, that bottle of axe should last you at least a day
I only wear boys' clothes, my voice is getting deeper and my chest flatter. How have you only just noticed my second earring.
Sincerely, your FTM son.
Dear person who called me a whore for wearing a tampon,
Should I start calling you a baby? Because pads feel like diapers when I wear them.
Sincerely, I enjoy putting in a tampon as much as you enjoy wearing your pad
Dear Facebook users,
Please remember that hash tags are for TWITTER.
Sincerely, #really #freaking #annoyed