Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
Deer spell check,
Eye don't trust ewe!
Dear "Do you have a hall pass?",
I'm 24. Do I really look young enough to be in middle school?
Dear Little Mermaid,
I think you being my favorite childhood movie is why the thought of eating fish disgusts me.
Dear man,
Please stop walking into me.
Dear person reading this,
Hahahahahahabananahahahahaha
Dear girls who use the period excuse every gym class,
I think you need to see a doctor if you have your period this much.
Dear Apple,
When is the iTampon coming out?
Dear couple in line at Walmart,
Don't you think you should of bought the condoms first?
Dear "money can't by you happiness",
That may be true, but I'd rather cry in a Lamborghini.
Dear mom,
WTF does not mean "way too funny".
Dear football players,
You may make the cheerleaders show up but we decide when they dance.
Dear Stephanie Meyer ,
So you based Twilight off of a dream? "It does not do to dwell on dreams..."
Dear Psychology class,
Thanks for the tips.
Dear Titanic,
If I watch you backwards, you're a movie about a magical ship that brings a thousand people back to life and they all have a great party and go to England. THE END!!!
Dear movie makers,
Now that you've done sparkling vampires, time to do glow-in-the-dark zombies.
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