Dear Boys,
If you want me to look like the girl on the victorias secret pinup, you better look like the boy in the hollister ad.
Dear World,
Just because I'm tough... doesn't mean that I can't hurt too.
Dear girl I make awkward eye contact with,
I'm going to smile at you in the hall on monday, okay?
Dear Internet,
Please, I'll come back. It's just, well . . . exams dropped by for a visit. Don't worry, I'll be back soon.
Dear frustrating heart/brain combo,
WHY do I feel like I have been in love with a boy I barely know for FOUR YEARS now?!?!
Dear girl who is my friend,
Do I need to be a worse friend in order for you to become my girlfriend or what?
Dear first roommate at college,
I wanted to make this work, I really did. But when all you talk about is you and your problems, I find it harder and harder to even be in the same room as you. You are very self-centered. You blast the music genre you know I hate, you leave messes everywhere, and have no regard for any other person other than your weekly crush. You act like a two year old when you take every concievable kitchen utensil out to use and put nothing back, and give everyone else attitude when we ask you to clean it up. The list really goes on and on. I'm trying to be patient and be nice, becasue I believe everyone deserves that, but you are making it really hard for me.
Dear Ciaran,
We had a good run. Your time in a coma was hard for everyone. When you were pronounced braindead we all cried. but when they realized you were an organ donor they prepped you for a surgery, which ended up saving 6 lives.
Dear me,
Please remember, when I had the option of eating more or exercising to deal with the stress of finals before graduation, I took time out of my studies to EXERCISE this morning , instead of stuffing my face and cramming like I did yesterday
Dear Bruce,
Oh, you think darkness is your ally. But you merely adopted the dark; I was born in it, moulded by it. I didn't see the light until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but BLINDING!
Dear Airport Security,
How is this gonna work??
Dear guy I'm trying not to like,
Please stop being cute. Actually, just avoid me completely.
Dear men of the world,
Did you know relative to its size the barnicle has the largest penis of all beings on earth
Dear Funny Movies,
Please explain why you have changed the definition of "funny" to "projectile vomit" and "poop in public"?
Dear Legos on the floor,
Owshitcrapholycowowshitfuckdammowshit
THIS IS PAGE 6
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