Dear "Deflategaters",
Maybe the NFL should deflate your ego and your air-heads!
Dear Nintendo,
Great job making your first game about Princess Peach not sexist. She just used the power of uncontrollable emotions to float (happy), burn (angry), cry (sad), and heal (calm) her way to the vibe sceptor.
Dear college roommate,
Please remember that when life gives you lemons I'll bring the salt and tequila!
Dear Red Riding Hood,
Thank you for believing in me. I do pride myself on being a convincing cross-dresser.
Dear life,
You're not really that bad, i just need something to complain about.
Dear God,
Where were you when I needed you?
Dear religious people,
Are you only a good person because you are scared of going to Hell?
Dear Dora the Explorer fans,
"Explorer" in Spanish is "exploradora". Get it now?
Dear weather network,
You are all liars!
Dear Macklemore,
You can't take our clothes or our style!
Dear Obama,
The book 1984 was made to criticize totalitarian regimes, not an instruction manual.
Dear period,
Please stop being such a cockblock.
Dear Face,
Please refrain from breaking out right before Prom.
Dear people who want a fat Disney princess,
Would she also have heart problems, bad blood pressure and Diabetes?
Dear people who hate Muslims,
Saying all Muslims are terrorists is like saying all Christians are Westboro Baptists.
THIS IS PAGE 6
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