Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear scented markers,
I think my 4 year old is high...
Dear prejudiced and judgmental Americans,
The Muslim families at the community center in my neighborhood were just as terrified as the rest of us on 9/11.
Dear best friend,
Thank you for hitting ignore every time you get a new message while we're hanging out.
Dear "all white people are racist",
You do realize the irony of the statement, right?
Dear movie producers,
Please actually read the books before you make the movie.
Dear boyfriend,
If you can't handle me in sweatpants, you sure don't deserve me in a wedding dress.
Dear Disney,
Please consider making a gay princess.
Dear boy who told me you still have your virginity at 18,
Please don't be embarrassed.
Dear society,
You taught girls to be the little princess. Hermoine taught them that they can be the warrior.
Dear Nook, iPad and Kindle,
We don't run out of batteries.
Dear boy next door,
Thank you for giving the ultimate sacrifice and protecting our country.
Dear child,
I love you no matter what, I promise. I just like you better when you're sleeping.
Dear future children,
When you become a teenager and I tell you, "you can talk to me about anything," I swear, I am going to mean it.
Dear dog,
Thanks for giving me company when I'm alone, making me feel needed like no one else, and for peeing on my fat step-mother's leg. You are truly the best friend a man could have.
Dear kid bullying the only openly gay boy in class,
I dare you to lay a finger on him.
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