Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear girls,
Roses are red, violets are blue, keep your boobs in your shirt, we'll stop staring at you.
Dear music Industry ,
I can sing love songs, dress myself in meat, and use autotune to make myself sound better.
Dear hipsters,
We had an undeserved sense of self importance before it was cool.
Dear. people. who. type. like. this. ,
It. doesn't. make. your. point. any. stronger.
Dear Disney,
Why are all the princesses only 16 in the movies and marry after only a few days of knowing the prince?
Dear girls who's prom dresses look like two pieces of cloth held together by a beaded string,
Are you dyslexic??
Dear Life,
Why do you keep giving me to people?
Dear people who come up with decent comebacks,
Please leave some for the rest of us.
Dear friends,
Just because I got Bs on my report card does not mean you can nickname me "stereotype breaker!"
Dear radio alarm clock,
Thanks for waking me up with Eminem. I needed it.
Dear floor,
I missed you!
Dear GPA,
OM NOM NOM.
Dear dog staring at nothing down the hall,
Please stop it. It's freaking me out and we're home alone at night.
Dear paycheck,
OM NOM NOM.
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