Dear Mary Poppins,
We have been informed that you have used magic is front of muggles. Your trail is set for next Friday at eight.
Sincerely, the Ministry of Magic
Dear U by Kotex,
You're right. Now that all my pads and tampons come in highlighter colors I'm so excited to get my period!!!!
Sincerely, nope. still sucks.
Dear offended friend,
Please know I am giving my boyfriend a VERY long talk later.
Sincerely, he meant that you were gentle like a cow, not a cow.
Ark Diary Day 67,
Griffins are freaking delicious
Dear Fred and George,
You had the Mauders Map, and yet you never said anything about Ron sleeping with Peter.
Sincerely, and you never thought to ask...
Please name your son Sam.
Dear Hunger Games,
Wait, wait, wait. If they're on camera all the time, when do they pee?
Sincerely, ...well that's awkward
Dear Disney Princesses,
How do you all speak English??
Sincerely, Belle is French, Pocahontas is Native American, and Ariel lives under freaking water.
My step daughter talked to animals, lived with 7 old men, let strangers into the house, and married a man who went around kissing dead girls. And you wanted me to let her rule my kingdom?
Sincerely, the not-so-evil queen
What do you call guys who make jokes about women belonging in the kitchen?
Dear guys everywhere,
No, sir, your balls are not bigger then mine. Mine were so big that they had to be put on my chest to avoid chaffing.
Sincerely, a classy lady.
Dear people who like nerdy jokes,
The past, present, and future walk into a bar...
Sincerely, it was tense
Dear Ginny Weasley,
It's a journal, not a diary.
Sincerely, Tom Riddle
No no no, guys...I said I hate FIGS!