Dear Prince Charming,
My stepsisters were a brunette and redhead. You let them try on the slippers. I'm blond. Good try, but you did know my hair color and that rules out a couple thousand people.
Dear Paula Deen,
I don't hate you, but I find your racism ironic considering the Southern style cooking you're famous for was created by black people.
Sincerely, a black person
Dear next-door neighbor who thinks that they have to mow their lawn everyday,
Please YOU ONLY NEED TO MOW THE LAWN ONCE BIWEEKLY! STOP WAKING THE BABY THE MOMENT I GET HER TO NAP!
Sincerely, Frustrated Babysitter
Troll!!!! Troll in the Dungeon!!! TROLL IN THE DUNGEON!!!
Sincerely, thought you ought to know
Dear Americans freaking out over Kate and William's baby,
Pretty sure we fought two wars so I don't have to care.
Dear people who question why girls go to the bathroom together,
Hermoine went alone and got attacked by a troll.
Sincerely, know your shit.
Dear people who say they have 'OCD',
Please realize that OCD is a mental disease, not something cute to name your pet peeves. You wouldn't joke about having Alzheimer's.
Sincerely, someone who's ill
PMS is based on chemicals in your body. Not hindsight bias/social construct.
Sincerely, also a psych student
Dear pet rescue,
That Great Dane didn't have to get put down. You had 8 people apply for her, myself included and you didn't approve anyone.
Sincerely, stop being mad at people for buying dogs when it's your fault for not approving anybody!
Dear divorced parents,
Stop blaming each other and realize it's both of you who put me in the middle. This doesn't have to be a war.
Sincerely, even your eighteen year old son cried saying he couldn't take it anymore so cut it out.
Dear Math teachers that used to tell us "You need to learn how to do this without a calculator because when you're older you won't be carrying around a calculator with you wherever you go",
Sincerely, 90% of this generation has smartphones.
Dear Sherlock Writers,
How the heck did he survive the fall!? STOP TORTURING US AND GIVE US AN ANSWER!
Sincerely, All Sherlock Fans
Please remember that no matter how chemically balanced you are, I still need you. I want you to feel better really quickly, so I'm taking antidepressants. Get well son.
Sincerely, the person you control
I love you for who you are, not for the labels people put on you. I don't care if you're a planet or not. You're still part of our Solar System and part of my heart.
Sincerely, accepting, not angry
Dear guys who say that want a girl without make-up in sweats with their hair tied back,
Please stop. What you mean you want is a girl with natural make-up so that any pimples or marks are covered up and hair that's been tied back strategically so that it makes them look good.
Sincerely, leave out the first and last part and then you'll be more accurate