Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
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TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear God,
Please, please, please, for the love of all that is holy, do NOT let this thing fall down on me.
Dear Washington D.C.,
Calm down, it was just an earthquake. These things happen.
Dear Mulan,
If I watch the movie backwards, it tells the story of a decorated war hero who goes back home to get a sex change.
Dear room-mate watching Japanese anime,
Please explain why the characters' words don't match the movements of their mouths, and why there are abnormally shaped, floating, talking animals everywhere.
Dear telemarketers,
Please respond when I answer the phone and say "Buddy the Elf! What's your favorite color?"
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