Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear people who tease me for reading for fun,
I was able to slack off and not read the story when it was given to us as assignment yesterday because I read two years ago for fun.
Dear overly large cricket that caused me to run out of my dorm room screaming,
Thank you!
Dear girl with a broken heart,
I have duct tape...
Dear headache,
I know what your trying to tell me...
Dear Hollywood,
There are tons of books I hate. Make movies about them?
Dear high school girls,
When I see lingerie at Victoria's Secret that looks exactly like your homecoming dress, there's a problem.
Dear movie makers,
You do realize that the reason the book was turned into a movie because people loved the BOOK, right?
Dear cellphones,
Thanks for ruining the fun of pushing people into pools.
Dear bed,
I really can't stay.
Dear Hollywood,
So you're re-releasing Star Wars, The Titanic, Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid, Monsters inc., AND Finding Nemo?
Dear "Money can't buy happiness",
Maybe not, but I'd rather cry in my Ferrari.
Dear Calculus,
If I can't have an imaginary friend, you can't have imaginary numbers.
Dear weight loss ad,
Wow! Not only does your diet plan make people look thinner, but it changes their race and age too!
Dear person who overheard my conversation,
I am not racist. I was talking about jelly beans.
Dear boyfriend,
I'm not really scared of spiders, I just feel loved knowing you'd protect me from even the smallest villain.
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