Dear blondes that get mad at dumb blonde jokes,
People joke that Latinos steal cars, Australians ride kangaroos, Indians work at 7-11, Muslims are terrorists, Chinese people can't drive, Black people are gangsters, and White guys can't dance. Get over it.
Sincerely, Ginger with no soul
Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
Sincerely, Just saying
Dear Foreign Language Teacher,
The hardest part about the test isn't knowing the vocab, it's figuring out what each picture is
Sincerely, is that a coat or jacket?
You're tall. I'm short. I will periodically ask you to grab something from the top shelf.
Sincerely, you're the one who suggested I stop climbing on the counters
Dear Mr. Weasely,
The exact function of a rubber duck is a bath time companion or toy.
Dear 'customer' who stole my phone while I was working to help you,
Please know that I had to run your credit, and know your name, address, and I also have you on camera stealing it.
Sincerely, knock, knock... it's the police.
Thank you for making my breath visible.
Sincerely, I LOOK LIKE A DRAGON!
Dear 7 year old brother,
Please continue to hop away like a bunny when I told you to 'hop off' because I was in a bad mood. You made my day.
Sincerely, Amused older sister.
Dear people who say "hate is a strong word",,
So would you prefer "I dislike you with the passion of a thousand burning suns"?
Sincerely, yeah, I didn't think so.
Dear Football team,
Yes, yes I am blaring the Tangled soudtrack from my car right next to where your practice is taking place. No I will not stop.
Sincerely, if it's so stupid, then why is numer 29 singing along?
Dear people who live on the second floor,
I know I'm easy, but that doesn't mean you have to constantly use me.
Did you really just ask me if I wanted to go spin donuts in the local grocery store parking lot at 9 at night?
Sincerely, I like when mom is on vacation.
Dear Sex Ed Teacher,
You just made Sex Ed my favorite course.
Sincerely, just stuck your whole arm in a condom to show that no guy can lie that the condom 'doesn't fit.'
Dear Trix Rabbit,
We can team up and destroy those nosy kids once and for all. And then we'll have our cereal all to ourselves.
Sincerely, Lucky the Leprechaun