Dear donut holes,
Please stop tricking me into thinking you're healthier than a whole donut because you are smaller... It doesn't count when I eat fifteen of you.
Sincerely, donut shop worker who gets free donuts
Dear guys who tell me they "like less makeup",
Please wear less makeup then.
Sincerely, Why are you telling me this anyway?
Who do you think you're fooling? You are NOT milk's favorite cookie.
Sincerely, Chips Ahoy
Dear children's book illustrators,
Where does it say I'm an egg?
Sincerely, Humpty Dumpty
Dear English teachers,
Today I graded papers for my own teacher as I already read the book. The test they had was open book and about 5 out of 7 failed.
Sincerely, how do you do it?
So you called in, over the phone, because you want to disuss issues with your account, but you don't want to talk about your account over the phone because it might not be secure?
Sincerely, not sure where to go from here
I do not forgive you for throwing things at me when your drunk. I do not forgive you for making me watch my back when your drunk because im scared you might hit me. Im sorry i cant explain to you right now why im not going to your house. Im sorry i dont think you deserve that kind of respect...
Sincerely, A daughter that needs to know you still love me
Getting lost on the day that I have a speech to present and am performing with my choir was not very considerate!
Sincerely, I sounded like Donald Duck singing the Hallelujah Chorus
Dear Netflix ,
Please add more disney movies.
Sincerely, still a child at heart.
Seriously, what is Ramen?
Sincerely, British and confused
Dear girls everywhere,
I've scheduled the times I will visit. Most of these times are dates, dances, vacations, presentations, and, most importantly, those days when you decide to wear white pants.
Sincerely, your period.
Dear person who first ate an egg,
Who eats something that comes out of a chickens ass
Sincerely, confused and disturbed person
That wasn't very knife
Dear people asking about my track event,
"Oh, so you jump over hurdles?"
Sincerely, no... we hurdle over hurdles