SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear people who pray before meals,
Please stop praying to God to make your double-decker cheeseburger, large coke, and fries nourish your body. That's not how it works...
Dear mandatory swim class at school,
Please don't make me take this class! I am too nervous to wear a swimsuit all semester especially on the days that I have my period!
Dear Procrastination,
Thank you for making me possible.
Dear those who live in da hood.,
You think you live in a bad neightborhood? I live in the spaghetto!
Dear girls,
Please stop complaining about your periods. Would you rather be pregnant?
Dear cheerleaders,
Jumping around half-naked with pom poms is not a sport!
Dear sleeping dog,
RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF!!!!!
Dear "Abra Kadabra",
You're doing it wrong.
Dear Girl,
You're beautiful, intelligent and perfect just the way you are.
Dear Rock, Paper, Scissors,
You're doing it wrong.
Dear new roommate,
Life would be much easier if we could get over this first awkward phase so I could comfortably fart wherever I needed to.
Dear spider,
Could you have picked a better spot to hang out than the bathroom?
Dear East Coast,
Do you wanna build a snowman?
Dear teachers,
We are giving you apples for a reason. It worked with Snow White...
Dear Hermione,
May I please borrow your time-turner? I just accidentally tooted in front of my crush!
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