Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear Kim Kardashian,
Please realize that my career on Dancing With the Stars lasted longer then your marriage.
Dear thirsty person trying to get the last bit of water at the bottom of the cup,,
Hold brothers. Hold. Charge!!
Dear dog,
Yes, the mailman has come to kill us all. Thanks for the warning.
Dear NASA,
Your Mom thought I was big enough.
Dear world,
Cross walk buttons don't work. They're there so you have something to do.
Dear Edward and Jacob,
I have to tell you two setting important... I recently found this out... I'm... A lesbian
Dear Colorado,
It's illegal for a man to kiss his wife while she's sleeping?
Dear two-ply toilet paper,
I guess it's true. You don't really know what you have until it's gone.
Dear girls in the dressing room getting dressed for our Musical screaming "I can't get the dress over my boobs,
You do realize that we can hear you outside of this door.
Dear identical twin ,
You should have seen your face...
Dear Manufacturers of the Straw,
Please make your straws longer than the bottles
Dear writers of The Lion King,
About that "Cats always land on their feet" thing...
Dear runner,
Yes, I see you checking yourself out in the shop windows.
Dear Carrie Underwood,
We give you props, but next time maybe you shouldn't carve your name in the seats. It's a dead giveaway.
Dear super hot male teacher trying to teach about reproduction,
Is this as awkward for you as it is for us?
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