Dear Mom and Dad,
Even Dora's parents let her explore the world with talking animals and a singing backpack, and I can't hang out with my friends after 12?
Sincerely, Your grounded 23-year-old son
Please come to my yard even though I can not make milk shakes
Sincerely, lactose intolerant. . .
Please stop bullying people so that Disney and Nickelodeon can stop all those annoying commercials
Sincerely, Annoyed person who just wants to watch TV
Dear Five Finger Death Punch,
Please explain to me how you punch with five fingers
Sincerely, a Nickelback Fan