Dear mother in denial,
Please stop pretending like nothings wrong with me. I was hospitalized because I tried to kill myself.
Sincerely, your daughter who's social anxiety is getting out of hand
Go to he'll.
Sincerely, frustrated iPhone users.
Dear English Teacher,
The curtains and sky are blue because blue is my favorite color.
Sincerely, the Author
Dear male friend,
Thanks for being totally chill about lying on my stomach while we watched TV together. I would do it with any of my female friends, and it's nice to know that just because you're a different gender, you aren't automatically involved with my romantic/sex life.
Sincerely, a girl who's glad that friends can be friends
Dear people defining racism,
Does it really matter? Maybe we should focus on stopping discrimination, individual and institutional.
My mom WILL beat you so you might as well give up while you're ahead.
Sincerely, an optimistic daughter
Dear fellow employees,
If I can't hear the customer, and the customer can't hear me, the radio volume may be too loud.
Sincerely, the employee who wants you to turn the loudspeaker the fuck down.
Dear assuming girl,
Please accept that there very well may be a million reasons that boy doesn't ask you out. Top of the list would be he's not attracted to you. Close second is you're arrogant enough to assume that you "know" that boy wants to ask you out. Why don't you give it a shot?
Sincerely, Stop the double standard
Dear teachers telling me "You'll just be their boss one day,",
Sincerely, I don't plan on being a manager at the ghetto McDonalds.
Please forgive me. I promised I'd never be one of those drunks who clogged up the system. I don't know what happened, what went wrong. I tried to drown a terrible month, nothing new there, and then suddenly I'm missing five hours of my life, suffering from hypothermia so badly it would have been cause for medical care on it's own, and with a tube in my arm. I never meant for this to happen. You were nothing but professional, which was far more than I deserved. I hope my future regular donations of blood go some way to lessening the debt I owe you.
Sincerely, A very remorseful idiot.
Dear everyone on this website,
Thank you for hating Justin Bieber, Jersey Shore, and Toddlers and Tiaras.
Sincerely, restores my faith in humanity
Dear pro-gay marriage people,
Please realize, you're the ones being assholes. 99% of those of us opposing you love gay people, we just don't think there's a right to marry, and past experience tells us this is going to be used to persecute Christians and anyone else who disagrees with homosexuality. Don't believe the government would ever force a church to marry gay people? You probably also thought Obamacare wouldn't force the Catholic Church to provide or perform abortions.
Sincerely, someone who sees where things are going.
Dear people who judge other based on their religion,
Please stop. Why can't you believe what you believe and leave others alone?
Dear schools who put "buckle up" signs up,
I would if I could, but I can't
Sincerely, girl on the bus
It is great that your brother/wife/roommate/blood donor works in a different store from this chain. That does not, and never will, entitle you to an employee discount here. Especially because you have nothing proving they actually do work there.
Sincerely, yes, I am calling you a liar. Also, you're an idiot.