Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
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Dear Walmart,
Please open up about 20 more checkout lanes.
Dear God,
If you can't make me skinny, please make all my friends fat.
Dear grumpy parents who don't let little boys wear pink,
Children don't start understanding the difference between boys and girls until after age 5.
Dear Boyfriend,
Thank you for being amazing and taking care of me while I was drunk and not being a standard college boy and take advantage of a drunk girl
Dear high school friends complaining about not getting a snow day,
I have no sympathy for you.
Dear English Teacher,
Thank you for helping me defending the house of Hufflepuff in class.
Dear Adele,
Get well soon.
Dear feminists,
I'm all for girl power, but it's nice when guys open doors.
Dear seinor I text and flirt with all the time ,
Please stop acting like you like me when all you want is sex because im actually starting to like you ..
Dear Hurricane Earl,
Please go fu*k with another coast.
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