Also By Us Slow Robot I Waste So Much Time I Waste So Much Money
kinderboo ad
Dear congress,
You're doing it wrong.
Dear "Are You Tougher Than A Boy Scout?",
Why yes, yes I am.
Dear customer,
It is great that your brother/wife/roommate/blood donor works in a different store from this chain. That does not, and never will, entitle you to an employee discount here. Especially because you have nothing proving they actually do work there.
Dear girls,
Please take your own bra off. We can't figure it out and it looks sexier when you do it.
Dear 12-hour fresh breath mouth wash,
I'm going to go ahead and call bullcrap on this one.
Dear Pandora,
Haha the joke's on you....
Dear high school movies,
Please start hiring actors who are actually high school age.
Dear Captain Jack Sparrow,
Please explain how you wake up in the morning after drinking a whole bottle of rum the night before, and you're not hungover.
Dear Five Finger Death Punch,
Please explain to me how you punch with five fingers
Dear Mom,
Please stop accusing me of not being a virgin. I am dating a great guy who loves me and respects my wishes.
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