Dear friend who complains they haven't had sex in 6 weeks,
I've gone 15 years. Does that mean I win?
Sincerely, preachin' to the choir here kiddo.
Dear "An apple a day keeps the doctor away",
Bull crap!
Sincerely, Snow White.
Dear makers of "I can't believe it's not butter",
... I can.
Sincerely, Jene'e
Dear airlines,
So I have to wear a seatbelt while we are going two miles per hour while going to the runway, but not when we are 10,000 feet in the air while going several hundred miles per hour?
Sincerely, confused passenger.
Dear Math,
Please stop making me find your X. Just face it, she's not coming back to you.
Sincerely, ...but Y?
Dear cute guy i stalked on Facebook,
Oops, forgot I wasn't supposed to know that...
Sincerely, I'm psychic?
Dear boy who asked me to watch The Lion King with him,
You obviously know that the way to my heart is through Disney Movies.
Sincerely, going to marry you one day.
Dear guy that I told I like,
Please realize that it's totally ok to say no (instead of not yet) and that you shouldn't feel pressured to say 'i'm not ignoring you' if you would really like some space.
Sincerely, honesty would make this easier I swear. (And yes I'm assuming much)
Dear Edward Scissorhands,
So how does "rock, paper, scissors" work for you?
Sincerely, Curious
Dear World,
Remember back in elementary school when everyone got valentines? I miss those days.
Sincerely, lonely teens everywhere
