Dear drunk driver that popped up on the curb in front of my house,
I hope you crash. I hope your car bursts into flames and you have to drag your broken body out of the wreckage. I hope you have to live in a wheelchair, remembering your stupidity every time you see your burned face in the mirror.
Sincerely, you came within an inch of hitting my children, you moronic jackass
Dear Communist teacher,
I don't mind your political views, but just don't shove them on me.
Sincerely, A students who knows that there's more to American history than the cold war and red scares
I'm not interested in going anywhere with you.
Sincerely, A Grain of Salt
Calling black Republicans "Uncle Toms" is racist. Your political affiliation does not give you license to be hateful to the people who disagree with you.
Sincerely, Sensible Americans
Dear Disnsy love story enthusiasts,
If you think Ariel was a great love story you need to watch something with a real tear jerking love story...like jack and the cuckoo clock heart. Surprisingly a animation.
Sincerely, A REAL love story enthusiast
My condolences on the fact that you have terminal cancer (and may I say you look, and sound, very healthy for being in Stage Four). However, the fact that you "don't have long" to enjoy these video games doesn't qualify you to pay even less for them than you already are. You don't have long to enjoy your money, either, so you might as well hand the requiste amount over to us to pay for those games you so dearly want.
Sincerely, You already got a 20% discount, so I don't know what more you want
Why is it okay for Caitlyn Jenner to identify as a woman, but not for Rachel Dolezal to identify as black?
Dear people who celebrate opposite day,
If everything is opposite, shouldn't you be floating?
Sincerely, that's the opposite of being pulled down by gravity.
Please smile while you still have teeth.
Sincerely, You are all gorgeous
Please stop charging me for things and then making me pay for stuff myself. I don't get an allowance, I don't have time for a job during the school year because I'm so busy trying to keep up my grades, and you took the babysitting job I used to have. How am I supposed to pay for things with no job, no allowance, and you charging my for stupid things like having to clean my room? Do i get to charge you for all the times I'm stuck watching my siblings?
Sincerely, teenage, poor, and frustrated
Dear Star Wars fans,
What if the Indiana Jones stories are really Han Solo's dreams when he is frozen in Carbonite?
Dear Boys who claim that girls only go for the hot guys,
Please remember that we feel the same way about how you pick your girlfriends. Also, please remember that we want to be teens, not 16 year old mothers. With that in mind, note that we don't want a hot guy, we want someone who understands us.
Sincerely, Girls everywhere
My dear boys,
Please don't forget me!!!
Sincerely, Sincerely, Mom (who just lost custody because she had to get a FT job after a divorce)
Please stop cooking my flesh. I kind of need that, and it doesn't even taste good.
Sincerely, The blister, peeling, limping, "lobster" girl.