Dear guy in the stall next to me,
Coughing to cover-up the sound of you wanking it doesn't help.
Sincerely, really? in a University library bathroom?
Why is it that when men tell women about women's experiences, it's "mansplaining," but when women tell men about men's experiences, it's "discussing male privilege?"
Sincerely, someone who doesn't like double standards
Please make it so that an animal that has been named with a name tag can't despawn.
Sincerely, tired of respawning Jebediah the cow
Please stop tasting so freaking good. You're going to get me diabetes someday.
This is an experiment to test the efficiency of the moderator system. Vote yes on this and we'll see how long it takes to get to the main page.
Sincerely, I am submitting this on February 3, 2013
Dear alarm clock,
Just because you're out of battery, does not mean it's acceptable for you to not go off when I need you to
Sincerely, late for work
And I suppose… if it's my one last chance to say it I…
Sincerely, fades away
Dear daywalkers and the rest of the human race,
Please note that I have recently acquired a soul. If you find that yours is missing, do not panic. I have done you a favor as you will now survive the impending zombie apocalypse unlike the mortals. You're very welcome.
Sincerely, a ginger.
How is it that I can get rejected without making a move?
I'm sorry he broke up with you. You know I have an axe, right?
Sincerely, we'll chop up the sweaters.
Dear Chickens of the world,
Please forgive me for eating your babies. I'm sorry! Would you rather have me eat you instead ... ?
Sincerely, but eggs are so YUMMY
Dear Chinese People,
Please don't speak your communist ching chong language in public. We're in America, we're capitalist, and we speak English. I expect you to do the same. Thank You.
Sincerely, A REAL American
Dear Scrub Techs,
Please stop bullying the medical students
Sincerely, Why are you mad at me for 'breathing wrong'?
You get to poop on people's cars and get away with it?
Sincerely, the one time I did it.....