Please lower the volume when watching internet porn. My bedroom has the same vent as the basement.
Sincerely, your adult kid.
Dear new adjunct history teacher,
Please don't tell your Asian students that their eyes are shaped that way so they can survive the Ice Age. You must not have been told that the students fill out a teacher evaluation survey at the end of every term.
Sincerely, Korean student biding her time
Dear best guy friend,
Thank you for not getting weirded out when I asked you to prom. Even though it didn't work out like I hoped it would, it means the world to me that we are still best friends and that I don't have to hide it from you if I'm sad about this.
Sincerely, I promise I'm only in tears because I'm happy
Dear English Teacher,
Yeah, I'm skinny, I don't eat school lunch, but it doesn't mean I'm anorexic. I don't eat lunch because it tastes horrible and I eat at home anyways. My friends consider me VORACIOUS
Sincerely, yup that WAS a vocabulary word
Please stop being so paranoide and over protectuve of me that I can't even hang out with good people
Sincerely, your drug-free virgin daughter
Dear Little Sister,
Please stop leaving your birth control and sex toys on the floor of OUR bedroom. It is disgusting and I really didn't want to know you owned or used those things.
Sincerely, Trying to Ignore It
Dear people who say they hate their parents,
My parents were verbally abusive and neglectful. I can still say I love and forgive them.
Sincerely, be grateful for what you have and don't forget to forgive.
Dear Teacher at my school, ,
I really appreciate the detention I got for vomiting in the hall this morning.
It is not my job to be bubbly and happy every second of my 8-hour shift...
Sincerely, you realize that we aren't guaranteed lunch breaks, so none of us have eaten...
That 70's Show was aired in 1998. If we made an equivalent show now, it would be called That 90's Show.
Sincerely, 1990 was 23 YEARS AGO...how crazy is that?
Dear Ex Boyfriend,
Please know that you can still hold the door for me. It's just common courtesy.
Sincerely, your Ex Girlfriend who you dumped for no reason after 3 years.
I don't care if you're in Special Ed. I don't care if I had to do most of your projects in freshman year. I don't care that people glare at me when I talk to you. I don't care that you always have a better manicure than I do. I don't care if you ask me a ton of questions. I don't care that you're hard to understand.
Sincerely, you light up my day, every day
Dear guys of the world,
Do you not realize that a tailored suit is one of THE most attractive things you could wear?
Sincerely, that was the sound of my throwing my panties across the room
If you dare call my friend fat again I will castrate you with a machete.
Sincerely, you better sleep with one eye open