Dear man on the train,
Please look before you sit
Sincerely, you weren't welcome on my lap
Dear people who say "I've watched enough episodes of CSI to kill you and get away with it",
And I've watched enough episodes of Law and Order to make sure you don't,
If con is the opposite of pro, then what's the opposite of constitution?
Sincerely, think about it
Dear Nursery Rhymes,
"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jill forgot to take her pill and now they have a daughter."
Sincerely, the things my mother teaches me now are way more entertaining
Dear mom who just screwed up my medical form,
So I have asthma bronchitis cancer and I'm pregnant?
Sincerely, 15 year old boy who is confused how he got pregnant
Dear Kay Jewelers,
Every kiss does NOT begin with K.
Sincerely, peck, snog, make-out, smooch, and French
I agree. Animal testing is a terrible idea. They get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
Sincerely, and they pee on the seats.
Dear people looking at me weird,
What? you haven't seen a 14 year old girl with a cape and a viking helmet ride freely on a trike before?
Sincerely, it's Wal-Mart, what did you expect?
I'm not single.
Sincerely, I'm dating a ninja
Dear girl coughing obnoxiously in class,
Please note that we all helped to sneak the cough drop across the room so that you could shove it in your mouth.
Sincerely, why did you give a confused look and throw it in your bag!?
Dear broken iPhone,,
I did not want to text "Be there after sex."
Sincerely, guess I'll see you after sex, Mom.
Dear people who point to their wrist when their asking about the time,
Do you point to your butt when your asking where the toilet is?
Sincerely, it makes sense.
Thank you for believing me when I tell you that every day I sing and dance in my high school just like in high school musical.
Sincerely, foreign exchange student from the US who can't stop smiling
Dear snotty girl at school,
Please stop with the "really hot" suspenders.
Sincerely, my grandpa could wear them with more swagger...