SORT BY
TODAY
THIS WEEK
THIS MONTH
ALL TIME
Dear Mom,
Please don't ask me to tell you me course load for next year "again" when I haven't told it to you at all yet.
Dear "Driving around town with the girl I love",
I see you and I'm like... You know what I'm like.
Dear Pastor Against Porn,
Please don't judge porn, or the people in it. They're expressing themselvses, and their sexuality, and earning a living at the same time. I'm sorry you have a problem, but too much of anything is bad for you. A drug addict doesn't get better by blaming the drugs.
Dear people who like science jokes,
There are 4 kittens on a roof. Which one falls off first?
Dear coworker,
I believe you, but if you're going to cheat on your diet with a piece of chocolate, do not do so in the bathroom.
Dear world,
Glitter is like herpes but safer
Dear DBPB,
Please take down the verification code. I just want to take part in some intelligent conversation for once.
Dear Lord of Castamere,
In a coat of gold or a coat of red, a lion still has claws, and mine are long and sharp, my lord, as long and sharp as yours.
Dear White People,
Please stop feeling bad for yourself, it's getting pathetic.
Dear Marching Band members,
Let's get this straight, we're two different kinds of people. While I don't have the coordination to march in rhythm and play an instrument at the same time, if you had suited up against me and my kind, you would still be eating through a straw.
Dear Internet,
You have nothing on me, cos' tonight, I am going to sleep at 11.30 p.m.
Dear best friends teacher,
Please stop imagining we are dating. I just like listening to music and catching up with him at the end of the day.
Dear Mathew Taranto,
So Brawl in the Family is over, and you end it with a song full of feels...
Dear family,
Please stop thinking I'm evil when I suggest that a socialist economy could do America some good. I don't want us to go into debt because of an infected papercut.
Dear self,
Please continue to be darling gourgeous, wicked smart, and basically the best person ever. People fall in love with you/me just from our flirtatous winks.
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