Please leave me be with my oversized shirts and skinny jeans and lack of makeup or motivation. And while you're at it, stop picking on me so much for not being a 'normal' girl.
Sincerely, I just want to disappear. Is that okay with you?
Please take a hint. You're the most amazing girl I know. We were Eric and Ariel for the school musical, the Beast and Belle the next year, and Romeo and Juliet this year. I've known you since we were 5. Words cannot describe you. Can't you see the way I look at you every day? All the other relationships in the world wouldn't compare to ours.
Sincerely, Kate, if you're reading this, you know who it is.
Why does my level of success in life depend on whether or not I'm in a relationship?
Since my two of my closest friends are dating now, can you get all the other couples I'm sure will get together at some point, you know, get together sooner? I'd like to place some bets.
Sincerely, at least then I'll be a rich third wheel
Please help me. I have a busted ankle and can't walk yet you still want me to make supper. I have to "remind" you to make something for me too when you make something. And I really appreciate having to get my own ice packs and water and figure out how to carry them with crutches.
Sincerely, did you ever love me?
Please stop sharing "Christian" memes over Facebook. Get your Bible out, read, and use your brain to interpret scripture. Share insights with people face-to-face. Don't trivialize your faith by making a show of it and/or without critically assessing your views. And for God's sake, show love and spiritual discernment in all you do, not pride-filled judgment and condemnation.
Sincerely, a brother in Christ.
Dear IRS Scammers,
Please stop calling me and threatening to take my whole life away
Sincerely, a citizen that knows
So you don't drink coffee to avoid addiction? You do realise that only the caffeine is addictive, right? Caffiene addiction is not harmful. And your energy drinks have over double the amount of caffeine as a standard cup of coffee
Sincerely, and double the sugar and tons of other nasty stuff
I'm glad your new husband shares your love of Egyptology, and I don't mind your having an Ancient Egypt-themed reception, but WHY did you have to have it in a marquee on the coldest, rainiest day of the year so far for it?
Sincerely, your freezing, drenched sister whose dress will become see-through if it keeps raining
Please eat a snickers. You get really forceful and arrogant about your worldviews and personal choices when you're hungry. If you really want to win people over to your side then try being persuasive and convincing, not insulting and hostile.
Sincerely, Ate at McD's just to spite you
Dear People who complain about working,
I'll take your unwanted job
Sincerely, Teen trying to pay their way to Europe but sick of having their mom drive them around
What's the difference between transsexual and transgender? One of my friends says there is no difference, but another says there is...
Sincerely, afraid I'll use the wrong word and insult someone
yes, I know you all have children. Yes, I'm also positive I never want any. Do you want to amputate your left foot?
Sincerely, may be a quite harsh comparison, but stop nagging me!