Dear traditional schools,
How can you summarize my learning into a single letter? My name should not have more letters than my education.
Sincerely, I went to a grade-less high school and I’m going to be a doctor
Dear friend who says she dibs Bucky Barnes in The Winter Soldier,
I totally called dibs first
Sincerely, I saw the first Captain America before you
I think whether or not we use tampons is our choice, don't you think?
Sincerely, Forced to swim
Dear asexual girlfriend,
It's saddening to know that you're afraid I'll decide I need sex and leave you for someone who will give it to me. I just want you to know, I love YOU, not the person you'd be if you were sexual..
Sincerely, your very sexual girlfriend who's willing to die a virgin
Dear Steak marinated in red wine sauce next to the grill...,
My hipster girlfriend thinks I'm a vegetarian, but you know our little secret don't you? ahahahaahahaha
Sincerely, Hungry Carnivore
Life is a joke. You can make it a sad joke, bad joke, not-joke, or funny joke.
Here, have a blanket. It's for shock.
Sometimes find happiness in life is like finding a needle in a haystack. The problem is, too many people are focused on the idea that the needle is the only thing that can help them, when they're surrounded by perfectly good hay.
Sincerely, The girl who's always there for you
Thanks for not being dead. I'm alive today because of my faith in You
Dear girl I like,
Why is it that you tell me that you have a crush on me, but when I ask you out, you reject me and tell me you're sorry but I'm the the most caring guy ever
Sincerely, a guy who really cares but can't wrap his head around this
Next time someone asks me if I'm on my period, I'm just going to say "YES I AM BLEEDING OUT OF MY VAGINA."
Sincerely, irate female
Dear people who take a step back when I tell them I'm studying Astrophysics at Uni,
Don't worry, it's not contagious
Sincerely, the girl who just loves the stars
Dear serial killer who may or may not be behind my shower curtain,
I have a black belt, I keep a metal baseball bat in my shower, and I fight dirty. Still wanna try to kill me?
Sincerely, a prepared Psycho fan
Dear People Who Think Disney Does Not Show Death,
Watch Tarzan, when Kala enters the Tree House. You will see Tarzan's parents.
Sincerely, Ruined Your Childhood