Dear girls who's prom dresses look like two pieces of cloth held together by a beaded string,
Are you dyslexic??
Sincerely, it's "Prom" not "Porn".
Dear people of the world,
I will always be ahead of you, and in the future.
Sincerely, a girl in New Zealand.
I found the $100 without needing to clean. I think you need to find a better hiding place that isn't under my pillow.
Sincerely, son who is now $100 richer.
Can you please be as easy as half the girls in my class?
Sincerely, failing student.
Dear cute lifeguards,
I hope you can't tell that I just farted.
Sincerely, making bubbles.
Dear Domino's pizza is now served with real cheese,
What were you using before...?!?!?!
Sincerely, concerned customer.
Dear mom and dad,
I know you hate when I wear super tight skinny jeans because you think they look slutty. But, if I can't get them off, nobody else can either...
Sincerely, your stylish AND smart daughter.
Your mom thought I was big enough.
When you say "Write in complete sentences", the majority of the class assumes you are saying "write incomplete sentences".
Sincerely, minor formalities.
Dear hockey referees ,
Are you pregnant? Because you just missed two periods!
Dear Cowboys vs. Aliens,
Sincerely, Toy Story.
6 out of 7 dwarfs aren't happy.
Sincerely, Snow White.
Why does everything have to taste like you? I should get some credit. What have you ever done but walk across a road? I've jumped over the moon.
Want to hear a chemistry joke?
Sincerely, never mind, all the good ones Argon.