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Dear fedora haters,
Please just stop this irrational hatred, and stop stereotyping young men who wear them as virgins (and implying that virginity is somehow terrible). Why are you so mortally offended by their hat choice? They wear it because they like it, the same reason anybody wears anything. And no, I don't care that it's "actually a trilby" as if your self-righteous pretension somehow makes your bullying okay.
Dear pokemon fans,
Don't worry I didn't Pikachu while you Togepi
Dear people who make Hufflepuff jokes,
Please know that we don't FIND your jokes very funny.
Dear Cinderella,
Please understand that employing rats to make clothing is frowned upon in all kingdoms.
Dear People of the world,
If you are waiting for a sign, this is it.
Dear world,
Why do we cry about animals getting abused, and not HUMAN BABIES BEING MURDERED!?!?!?!
Dear nicest boy I know,
You're right. You do deserve to get the girl. Unfortunately, appearances do matter and she can't get over your smell, size, and acne.
Dear person who said that America has the highest obesity rate in the world,
Please stop saying stuff like that and not judge us by our country! You don't hear me making jokes about your country!
Dear "God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve",
Please I think you should Adam and leave.
Oi! Teachers!,
LEAVE US KIDS ALONE!
Dear "Best Friend",
Really? I can't have my best friend over because he is your ex? Oh and now you're ignoring both of us. Well that's fantastic. Really. I wonder how you're going to react when I told you he gave me a hug because of my great grandmother dying. Oh wait I didn't tell you she's dying because you never listen anymore.
Dear scientists,
Please hurry up with making uterus transplants safe. I'd love to give up mine, especially to make an infertile woman happy.
Dear Isabel,
Please understand how head over heels i am in love with you still
Dear "Why are you so cranky?",
AUNT FLOW'S VISITING!!!
Dear Gym,
I have worked out twice this week already...why am I not skinny yet?!
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