Dear friends bragging how far they have gone ,
I walked all the way to the super market yesterday
Sincerely, does that count?
Dear girl trying to grind with me,
... I'm gay
Sincerely, why did you think I dance so well?
Thank you for not bleeding every month. You're the best!
Welcome! Our sizes are small, extra small, and anorexic. Our prices are high, higher, and OMG you're in debt!
Sincerely, Abercrombie and Fitch
Dear Person using the Big Bang Theory to study for Biology,
I am a theoretical physicist. Not a biologist.
Sincerely, Dr Sheldon Cooper
Dear guy who just woke up,
Sincerely, the farts under your blanket
Please Sorry about all your socks. I'm just trying to free house elves.
Sincerely, the dryer
Dear girl sitting next to me on the bus,
Thank you for sneezing right in my face.
Sincerely, I appreciate the efforts you are taking to build my immune system
Dear Mc Donald's ,
Thank you for not serving hot dogs, I don't think I could order a super-sized Mc wiener with a straight face.
Sincerely, a dirty mind
Dear Bruno Mars,
Okay, it was cute the first few times you sang Just The Way You Are, but this is getting ridiculous. Will you just answer my question? Does this dress make me look fat?
Sincerely, your girlfriend who's getting tired of this
Please never refer to my flip flops as "thongs" again.
Sincerely, you found my what?!
Dear girl in my English class,
"I always thought the right to bare arms was the right to wear t-shirts
Sincerely, you made my day
Please stop using the saying "Till the cows come home"
Sincerely, We live on a farm... They are home.
It's not small, it's fun size...