Remember how you said a black guy would be president when pigs flew? You're welcome.
Sincerely, swine flu.
Please make that squeaking sound again.
Sincerely, I don't want people to think I farted.
Dear lady on the elliptical in front of me,
Sincerely, dying on the one behind you.
Dear French teacher,
"It's a video of France in the modern world, France today." Yeah right.
Sincerely, you're holding a VHS tape.